


What You Want

by JKRT



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Alcohol, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Awkward Riku (Kingdom Hearts), Blow Jobs, Clubbing, M/M, Miscommunication, Modern Era, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Pining, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-30
Updated: 2019-11-26
Packaged: 2019-12-26 15:37:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 24,764
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18285233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JKRT/pseuds/JKRT
Summary: You can’t always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you just might find...a tall redhead and his boyfriend? Aaannnd they’ll help you get what you need.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this because of a single off the cuff tweet from one of my friends about Riku and it got severely out of hand.  
> (It started out with a tweet, how did it end up like this?  
>  _It was only a tweet, it wAS ONLY A TWEET_.)

“I can’t believe you don’t think I’m fun.”

“I never said that,” Kairi said, giving her hair one last primp in the hall mirror. She turned to Riku with a smile. “I just said you wouldn’t fit in.” Riku frowned harder.

“I’m _great_ at parties.” Kairi shrugged into her jacket and reached over to boop him on the nose.

“It’s not the party part that I’m talking about.” Riku threw his hands out to either side.

“Then what is it?” There was a knock at their apartment door. Kairi glanced over her shoulder at it, and turned back to Riku, her grin even wider.

“Maybe it’d just be easier to show you.”

Kairi opened the door to a chorus of young women and was temporarily drawn into the small crowd for hugs. When they released her, she stepped to the side and gestured to them.

“Girls, this is Riku. Riku, these are the girls.” Riku didn’t say anything. His mouth was hanging open and had been since Kairi opened the door. Four ladies stood crowding in his and Kairi’s doorway dressed in things that only just passed the bar for “decent”. Mesh and spandex featured heavily, as did body glitter. The one with the long honey-blonde actually reached past Kairi to tap his chin up, forcing his mouth shut. Her makeup drew attention to her vividly green eyes. Riku began to blush and it made her grin impishly.

“Oh, he’s _cute_...” she purred. “Remind us again why he isn’t coming?” Kairi gave her a gentle shove away from the door frame as she joined them in the hallway.

“Selphie! Because pretty girls make him _useless_ , as demonstrated.” Kairi turned to grab the doorknob. “I’ll be back before two, and I’ll text if I’m not coming home at all, okay?” Riku nodded mutely. Kairi blew him a kiss and closed the door. Five laughs erupted behind it and drifted down the hallway. Left alone and staring at the door, Riku covered his hot face with his hands and whispered “ _Fuck_ ”.

~*~*~

“ _Fuck_ ” he said again, but with more feeling. It was 1:48AM and the light from his phone was _blinding_ in the otherwise pitch black room. The lack of lighting in the club that Kairi and her friends were at didn’t make the picture any easier to look at on the screen. Selphie had apparently commandeered Kairi’s phone, because both of Kairi’s hands were giving peace signs while Selphie’s face took up the corner.

The text accompanying the picture message said “ _cant stop wont stop_ ”. He squinted at it for a bit before typing back “ _Is this your ‘not coming home’ text?_ ” and pressing send. The reply was immediate - “ _lol yes_ ”. And then a moment later, “ _Sorry <3 _”.

And a bit after, “ _we got free drinks and may have overdone it. Gonna crash at Xi’s_ ”.

Riku rubbed at his eyes and tapped out “ok” and left his phone face down on the nightstand. It buzzed loudly a couple more times, but he rolled over instead of looking at it to go back to sleep.

~*~*~

Riku was tapping his foot half out of impatience and half out of restlessness while he waited for Sora to finish tying his shoes. It had the unfortunate side effect of causing his friend to pause.

“You’re unusually raring to go today.”

“Hm?” Sora pointed at Riku’s still bouncing knee. “Oh.” He forced it to rest, only for it to start up again a moment later. Sora raised an eyebrow. Riku huffed and leaned back against the bench. “Just thinking. A lot.”

“What about?” Sora asked, resuming tying his shoe. He tightened up the knot and stood. Riku joined him and they started in on an easy jog down the street.

“I don’t know. My life? People? A lot.” Sora hummed in encouragement for him to continue as he lengthened his stride.

“Kairi doesn’t think I’m fun.” Sora barked a laugh and looked over at him.

“That’s not true.”

“She told me I wouldn’t ‘fit in’ at a nightclub.” This time Sora nearly tripped he laughed so hard. He caught himself by speeding up a little, pulling half a step ahead of Riku. Sora didn’t say anything, just giggled to himself. Riku picked up his pace to match him.

“What?”

“Nothing.” Sora pulled ahead again. Riku matched him again.

“ _What_?”

“Nothing!”

“It’s obviously not nothing! What is it?” Riku shoved at Sora’s shoulder, but the brunet danced away from him, running backward for just long enough to say,

“I’ll tell you if you beat me!” And then he was taking off at a dead sprint.

“What? Sora! SORA! GET BACK HERE!”

In years past, it would’ve been a piece of cake for Riku to beat his friend in a footrace. Sora had been almost impossible to get to join him for workouts when they were teenagers, but their junior year of highschool Sora had discovered Ultimate Frisbee and taken to sports like a fish to water. He had continued through college and still played in a local league, where as Riku’s competitive track and swimming career had petered off in favor of his studies and job after graduation. Riku kept up enough for fitness and stress relief, but these days Sora easily had him beat in time spent being physically active.

It was times like this that he realized how much he _missed_ it. The thrill of a race, when the rest of the world falls away except for his competition and his goal. He had forgotten how strong that drive to win was, in the face of trying to be the best at other, more important things (or they had been, at the time). Sora may have had a head start on him, but he ran for pleasure not to win. Riku leaned forward, straightened out his hands and shoot off after him, a hungry smile on his face.

That was how they ended up in a park on the far side of town, miles off track from their usual Saturday morning jog. Riku was doubled over, hands on his knees. Sora lay sprawled on his back in the grass with his eyes closed. Once Riku had gotten enough breath back, he said, “I beat you. Tell me what you were laughing about.”

“We tied.”

“I’m the one still standing. I _beat_ you.” Sora pointed at him without looking. His accusing finger was directed to about a foot off from where Riku actually stood.

“You _pushed_ me. There’s a _difference_.”  Riku straightened slowly. He laughed lightly between heavy panting breaths.

“You should have specified then.” Sora blew a raspberry at him.

The gnawing curiosity to know what Sora had laughed at him for was energized by his victory. He had _won_ that answer and he was going to get it. So despite the numbness that ran through his legs like rivers, he braved the steps separating him and Sora. Widening his stance for balance, he leaned over, blocking the sun from the younger man who appeared to be basking in it, despite the hard run.

“I won. So spill.” Sora opened one eye to look at him. His characteristic grin split his face. He closed his eye again and held up two fingers in Riku’s face.

“Two words: Tight. Pants.”

“You-- What?”

“You heard me. Tight pants.” Riku stood up to pinch the bride of his nose, trying to wrap his head around

“ _What?_ ” he said again.

“You. Tight pants. In them. I pictured it. It was hilarious.”

“Oh. … _Hey!_ ” Sora snickered and kicked his feet in the air.

“But also, you in tight pants, completely SURROUNDED by people in _tighter_ pants and skimpy clothing. It is the _best_ thing I’ve ever thought of.”

“That’s--! What does that even have to _do_ with this?” Sora sat up immediately.

“Do you even know what a nightclub _is_?”

“Of _course_ I do!” Riku snapped defensively.

“But have you ever _been_?” His mouth open and then shut he looked away.

“Exactly!” The brunet said smugly, stretching out and then tucking his hands behind his head. Riku fell into the grass beside him with a huff. The blond lay there in silence, glaring at the cloudless sky for several minutes before he spoke again.

“I could go to a nightclub.”

“I bet you could,” Sora agreed.

“I could stay out all night partying.”

“Uh-huh.”

“What are you doing this Saturday?” Sora rolled over, grinning impishly.

“Nothing. Why?”

“Do you know anywhere good?” If it had been impish before, but Sora’s grin turned downright _devious._

“I might, yeah.”

~*~*~

_ >>where are you? _

Riku stared at the message - left unread - on his and Sora’s text chain. It had been like that for twenty minutes, when Sora normally responded in less than two. He sloshed his remaining drink around the ice cubes at the bottom of the glass and nervously tapped his phone against the bar top out of rhythm with the music. When it finally buzzed in his hand he nearly threw it into the crowd in his hurry to look at it.

_ <<Im soooooo sorry!! ;A; _

_ <<Goofbert got into something while I was at work, Im at the vet ER right now _

Riku set his drink down, giving his phone his full attention.

_ >>Oh shit, is he okay?_

_ <<Idk yet ;~; they had to pump his stomach _

His thumbs hesitated, but he tapped out, “ _Do you need me to swing by? I can leave. Send me the address”_

_ <<Nonono, ill be fine. U had this big thing planned!! Stay and have some fun, u nerd _

Leave it to Sora to still be looking out for other people’s good times while his dog was possibly dying.

_ >>Are you sure? It’s really not that big a deal. _

_ <<NO, u keep ur butt there!! Gotta prove Kairi wrong remember?? _

Riku turned his phone over, suddenly regretting everything that led him to be sitting at the bar of a nightclub alone.

But Sora had a point, and going home less than an hour after he had left with the intention of not coming back until morning would be an even bigger regret. He threw back the rest of his drink.

_ >>Fuck it, you’re right _

_ <<Dam rite i am!!!!! Go get em booooiiiii _

Shoving his phone deeply into his pocket, Riku stood and turned to face the crowd of the club’s dance floor. The realization hit him harder than the full force of the bass pounding out of the speakers: he didn’t know a single person here.

He didn’t know a single person, and his usual social situation buffer was pacing at a vet clinic somewhere on the other side of the city. Despite the overwhelming number of people before him, he was completely and utterly _alone_.

He sat at the bar and flagged the bartender down again.

“Yeah, I’m gonna need a double of spiced rum please? Actually, make it two.” Riku slid his credit card across the counter. The bartender quirked an eyebrow and smirked, stepping away for a moment. He returned with two glasses, a bottle, and Riku’s card wrapped in a receipt.

That was when Riku felt a hand on his shoulder, followed by a murmured “Sorry” that somehow managed to cut through the noise, and then his entire field of vision was skin. If he leaned slightly to the right he could see the whole person to whom it belonged. That may have been a mistake because the stranger was _gorgeous_ and Riku found himself leaning further in order to take in all of them.

It started with a hot pink crop top that had ‘Hot Stuff’ written on it in black sequins, but smooth skin and toned abs made up the majority of the view. There were tattoos of what looked like spiked wheels wreathed in flames peeking out from over the waist of low riding leather pants. Riku’s gaze ambled downward over shapely legs made even more so by the knee high boots that had both a heel and a platform. Riku tore his gaze away to get a look at their face. Long red hair stood up in extreme spikes, and green eyeshadow made an interesting counterpoint to the purple marks on their cheeks. The stranger’s eyes flicked back and a sly grin blossomed on their face. They propped their chin on one hand and batted their eyelashes at Riku.

“Sorry, am I in your space?” The stranger’s voice was a masculine purr. Riku felt it run down his spine like static. The crop top practically fell off their shoulders despite how broad they were. He quickly averted his eyes and took a gulp of his second shot. _Fuck_.

“Nope, not at all.”

“Really?” The redhead leaned closer. Riku mirrored the opposite, but only enough to keep from touching. Jewel green eyes gave him a sweeping once over.

“You got a name?”

“R-Riku.” He was stammering, but at least he wasn't slack-jawwed again, like with Kairi’s friends. He didn't know if that was better or worse. The stranger grinned, and in combination with the spiked hair and the intense eyes, it was more than a little intimidating.

“You can call me Axel. So, _Riku..._ What’s a guy like you doing at the bar by himself, huh?” Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe it was the panic, but reason deserted him and because of that, Riku was feeling bold.

“Well, I had been planning to party but my guests couldn’t show up.” Axel pushed off the bartop to stand in a slinky, languid motion.

“Party with me then.”

“What about your drink?”

“I’ll get it later.” The redhead blew a kiss at the bartender, tacking on a two finger salute right after. The bartender rolled his eyes and waved them off, turning back to other customers. “Come on,” Axel said, grabbing for Riku’s wrist.

Getting onto the dance floor alone had been like facing an wild sea in a lifeboat, but with Axel leading the way it was more like wading into a pool. Being a solid head and shoulders above the crowd from the platform boots probably helped.

The two of them ended up where the crowd was thickest and the music was tangible. It occured to Riku that he didn't actually know how to dance, and that Kairi was absolutely right, about everything, as usual.

Except no, _no_ , fuck that. He was here to prove her wrong and he was damn well going to do it. The night was young, he was three drinks in, and six plus feet of attractive stranger had invited him to dance. He was going to make the best of this, shitty awkward dancing be damned.

Something must've shown on his face, because Axel took one of his hands again and twirled him in what little open space they had.

“Hey, loosen up a little, man! I thought you said you were here to party?” Riku smiled wide, but it was joyless; all determination instead.

“I did!”

“Then what are you waiting for, dude? Let’s get to it!”

Luckily, Axel was a good enough dancer for the both of them. Between that as an example and desperately trying to avoid accidentally elbowing anyone else in the face, Riku managed okay. It even got to be fun after a song or two. Axel caught on to how Riku was copying every move and changed styles accordingly, making the dance about just the two of them. The space between them got smaller, and the dance moves more obscene, and Axel leaned in close with a look that was equal parts challenge and invitation.

Maybe it was the alcohol finally hitting him in earnest, maybe it was the contact high of the dance floor, but Riku’s mind locked on an end goal and put his body on auto-pilot before he had a chance to actually think about what he was doing. The natural motion of the crowd had already herded them closer to the DJ’s stage, but Riku put his hand squarely on Axel’s chest and _pushed_ , driving the other until their back was against the wall. And even after, he kept moving forward until there was no space left between them so that he could capture Axel’s mouth with his own. He had to go all the way up onto his toes to compete with those stupid platform boots, but no one had to know that. What mattered is that he had Axel pinned to a wall and that Axel was kissing him back. Riku held on to that for as long as he could before his calves started to cramp and he needed to take a breath. When he pulled away, Axel smiled slowly and said, “Oh, is _that_ how you wanna play it? Alright, alright, I’m game.”

Riku could count the number of times he had been picked up off the ground as an adult on one hand: by Sora when he got his degree, by Sora upon landing his first job, and also by Sora when he agreed to go to their high school reunion (which was a disaster).

But until that moment, he had never had a partner - short term or otherwise - who could lift him up.

Axel, however, hooked a hand around either thigh and simply hoisted, as though Riku weighed nothing. Riku’s mind went blank from the sheer thrill of it, barely remembering to cross his ankles behind Axel’s waist for balance. With the rush of adrenaline, everything sharpened in high resolution. The rapid beat of the music seemed slower, and he was suddenly aware of exactly how many colors were in the club’s light show. Axel’s winged eyeliner was razor sharp, neatly cutting through the green eyeshadow which was...glowing in the black lights? Holy shit, how had he not noticed that yet? It pulled all the attention to Axel’s vibrant eyes, but gave their entire face a distinct “otherly” quality.

“So where were we?” Axel purred, putting their mouths distractingly close together. Riku’s mind went blank again as he dove back in, crushing their mouths together and weaving his fingers into stiffly gelled hair. It fell quickly into a competition from there, for who was leading the kiss. Riku thought he might’ve had Axel on the ropes when he felt the world spin and the next thing he knew, he was the one against the wall. Axel, no longer using just their strength and good balance to hold Riku up, had some free hands to explore with. They didn’t wander far - first caressing his thighs, and one of them sneaking up to rest  at Riku’s lower back - but the attention was like fire, even through his clothes and Riku was soon rocking his hips in time with the music. _Fuck_.

Riku broke the kiss using the leverage he got from having his hands tangled in Axel’s hair.

“We should get out of here,” Riku said breathlessly. “Don’t want to make a scene.”

“What, two guys making out at the club? That’s basically what clubs are _for_.”  Riku was a bit surprised at the relief he felt at hearing Axel refer to himself as a guy. The redhead was sexy, full stop, but Riku’s preferences were definitely directed toward men. Kairi was right in that pretty girls made him useless, but he had never figured out if that was because of an attraction to them or something else.

Pretty boys though? _Oh_ , he could work with that.

“Might be a little more than just making out,” he replied, rocking a bit harder against Axel to impart his meaning. Axel’s eyes definitely flicked downward for just a moment before returning to Riku’s. The redhead leaned in to let his lips brush Riku’s and said, “I live nearby, if you wanna come over.” The offer was accompanied by Axel tracing along Riku’s hip bones with his thumbs, just barely dipping under the hem of Riku’s shirt. Riku nodded furiously, unable to speak. Axel was careful in setting him down, but eagerly took his hand and led the way to the club’s back exit.

~*~*~

The back exit led into a series of alleys away from the bright lights of the store fronts. Somewhere, behind the fog of rum and under the thrill of kissing strangers, a part of him was saying this was a bad idea that would lead to him getting kidnapped and/or murdered. But Axel threw a look at him, green eyes practically glowing in the dark and a smile so fierce Riku felt like he’d been punched, and the rest of him decided to smother the nay-sayer. Damn the torpedoes.

Or really, _fuck_ the torpedoes, and fuck this particularly fine torpedo _especially_. Preferably sooner rather than later.

Counter intuitive as it was, Riku dug in his heels against the cracked asphalt, the sudden drag causing Axel to whiplash back toward him. He reached up, dragging the redhead’s mouth down to meet his. God _damn_ those stupid boots were making this so much more difficult than it needed to be. Axel was more than willing to meet him halfway, and stepped closer to make it easier.

“Come on, it’s not much further.” Axel set them off again, this time at a fast jog. He was right; one more turn and an alley later had them stomping up a tightly wound set of firescape balconies. It took them all the way to the roof, where Axel fished a key to the access door out of one boot.

“It’s faster this way,” he explained. “Only have to go around the corner inside instead of around the front and through the lobby and _then_ up and around the corner.”

True to his word, they had only to go down a half-flight of stairs from the roof and around the corner to another door. Axel fished another key out of his second boot to unlock this one, and flipped a light switch.

It wasn't what Riku would call _spacious_ , but it was definitely larger than the apartment he shared with Kairi. The floorplan was open, the lack of walls making the space seem bigger than it was. To the left of the door was an entertainment area. A thick gray shag rug lay on the hardwood, boxed in by clean, raw brick. It held a well used couch opposite an obscenely large television mounted on the wall. Magazines, small electronics and personal items were strewn about the area. Axel had gone to the right, to what appeared to be a kitchen counter. Riku didn’t get much of a chance to investigate, because Axel was bending over, and that was a _much_ better view than a kitchen could ever hope to be. The lacing on the boots was apparently just for show - they zipped off and were laying on the floor in a matter of seconds. Now on equal footing, there couldn’t have been more than a two inch difference in their height, if that. Regular fluorescent lighting made everything about the redhead seem garrish, especially in such a...normal apartment.

Riku hadn’t realized that he was gazing around absently until Axel caught a finger under his chin and forced them to meet eyes.

“If you _really_ want, I can give you a tour, but I’m pretty sure that’s not why you’re here.” Riku’s eyes wandered down again, dancing over the length of Axel’s body. It hadn’t all been a play of the lights back at the club. His abs were just as defined, his shoulders just as broad...

His pants just as tight.

 _Tighter_ , even, now that Riku could see for sure where they ended instead of blurring into shadows. Axel put more pressure on his chin to force his eyes back up. Riku’s cheeks felt like fire and he was quite sure they were getting to be a match for Axel’s hair.

“If you’re having second thoughts, we can stop. I won’t be offended.”

“What? No!” Was that the impression he was giving? That was absolutely _not_ the impression he wanted to be giving. Axel shrugged.

“You just seem unsure.” He released Riku’s chin and instead tapped his forehead with two fingers. “Think on it.” The redhead looked like he was about to walk away, so Riku grabbed him by the wrist, and stuffed his fingers into his mouth.

Wait why did he do that.

They tasted like sweat and metal and maraschino cherries. He laved over them with his tongue, up between them and around, pulling them deeper into his mouth with a long hard suck.

WHY DID HE _DO_ THA- that noise that Axel made was _very_ interesting. The redhead’s brow had furrowed and he was biting his lip in an attempt to strangle what was most _definitely_ a moan, and that sound - undeterred - was the only thing Riku wanted to hear for the rest of the night. Yes. New goal. Riku opened his mouth and drew out the other man’s hand slowly, letting his fingers drag the entire length of his tongue. Axel reluctantly took his hand back, wagging his wet fingers at the blonde.

“Ohhhoho... _You_ …” He trailed off, “ _You_ are _trouble_. I like you.” He took a half-step back, holding one hand out to Riku. “If you’re game, the bedroom’s this way.”

Riku took the other man’s hand and was lead straight across the room to another door. This one opened into a darkened room whose only light came from a slot like window along the top of the back wall. Axel let his hand drop to confidently cross the darkness, weaving around darker shadows that must have been furniture. There was a click as Axel turned on a bedside lamp and the room was washed in a soft, warm light.

The center of the room was dominated by a king bed - not quite made, but not messy. It had crisp white sheets and a matching duvet. For some reason, the bed being blank and plain justified there not being much of any decoration in the room itself. The walls were empty, as were the matched nightstands. Laundry peeked out from under the bed and out of the slightly open closet doors, but otherwise there wasn’t much in the way of personality. Axel himself was the only splash of color in the whole room.

Maybe in an attempt to spread some of that color around, maybe because he was just that kind of person, Axel whipped off his sequined crop top and flung it into a corner of the room, flopping backward onto the bed to start shimmying out of his pants.

He was not wearing anything under them.

Riku coughed in surprise. Axel tilted his head further back to get a look at him.

“Oh, sorry, is this too fast for you?” He struck a pose that showed off the entire length of his long, long legs and brought back that deep purr from the bar. “I can make it more of a show, if you’d rather...”

“No! No, you’re fine.” Riku raised a hand to rub the back of his neck as he averted his eyes. Axel had _really_ nice legs.

“Hey, I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, pal. If you’re still having second thoughts, we don’t have to do anything.”

Oh fuck it.

Riku hooked his hands under the hem of his shirt and ripping off both it and the vest over it. He undid his belt as he strode toward the bed, dropping it on the floor. Axel had sat up on the edge of the bed, trying to peel the last stretch of leather from his calves. He looked up when Riku came to a stop in front of him. Riku took a firm hold of Axel’s shoulders and pushed him backwards, climbing up onto the bed after him. He pinned the redhead down with a kiss and Axel all but melted under him, the struggle with his pants forgotten. Deft fingers worked their way into Riku’s hair, and as the kiss grew more heated, started scratching at his bare back. They found their way down to Riku’s loosened waistband and slipped past it, exploring under his boxers. Riku groaned in appreciation when Axel dug his fingers in, kneading into the firm muscles of his butt. In turn, Axel hummed approvingly both at what he found and the blond’s reaction.

It was a quick show of finesse, the way Axel flexed his hands, splaying all of his fingers to catch in the fabric and strip Riku down in a matter of seconds. Riku gasped at the lightning-quick sensation of his pants being pulled to his knees and the cool air of the apartment washing over him. He shifted his weight up onto his hands, abandoning the kiss in favor of thrusting against Axel’s bare hips. One of Axel’s hands dug into the small of his back, holding him close while they ground against each other. Riku let his eyes fall closed and a moan tumbled out of his mouth as he arched his back, pushing harder against Axel.

Axel’s free hand found its way between them, taking hold of both their members and rubbing them together. The redhead tilted his head slightly to one side as he watched Riku’s face.

“Is just frotting enough for you, or did you want something a little more...intimate?” Axel’s voice dripped honey and seductive promise. Coupled with the knowing smirk and the hooded cat green eyes...

God-- that was--

_Fuck._

Axel took his bewildered silence as an opportunity to scoot backward, closer to the headboard. When he had room to, he sat up and opened the second of the two drawers on the nightstand. Without looking, he scooped into into its contents and came back with two foil squares. Ah, right.

Riku leaned forward to take one of the condoms, but the other man bypassed him completely, sticking the corner of one packet in his mouth as he tore open the other and casually took hold of the blond’s dick. Riku shuddered as Axel rolled the condom over his cock, his grip steady and unyielding and already gone when Riku tried to buck into it.

 _Fuck_. How long had it been since he’d last gotten laid? It was like he was coming apart at the seams and all they’d managed so far was just on the other side of heavy petting. But then Axel was kissing him again and there wasn’t anything that could hold his attention better.

Axel’s hands found his back again and they didn’t so much as pull him closer as coax him forward (as though he needed any encouragement). Together they made their way up the bed, surprisingly coordinated. Axel even somehow managed to seem graceful despite not using his hands. As soon as his shoulders thumped against the headboard, his touches changed from feather-light suggestions to unyielding demands against Riku’s skin.

Riku found himself hoisted up fully into Axel’s lap with that same ease from at the club. He tangled his hands into the same paths between the gelled spikes, familiar already despite only having done it once before. It somehow felt _right_ , pressed against this person he’d only known for...how long had it even _been_? What time was it? Riku pulled away, slowly opening his eyes like he was waking from a dream. Axel’s eyes were the first thing he saw, crisp and clear and sharp, boring in to him. Frantic thoughts and doubts burned away the longer he stared into them. Axel ran one thumb along Riku’s cheek and every hair on the blond’s body stood on end.

“So like I was saying…” Riku gulped audibly and in that blank moment found himself flat on his back. God _dammit_ , how did he keep _doing_ that?

And why did Riku get such a _thrill_ out of it?

If he kept blushing like this he was going to be permanently red, there was just no avoiding it at this point. Axel was smiling down at him.

“You keep making that face.”

“Huh?”

“Like you’re surprised.”

“Well you keep…” There were words for what was going on, he was sure of it, but the only words he could think of while looking up at Axel were ‘gorgeous’, and ‘want’ and ‘yes’. “... _doing_ things.” The redhead snorted in laughter.

“Oh, man, if that’s all then I’m _really_ about to blow your mind.”

“You’re what?” Axel looped an arm under each of Riku’s knees and leaned forward, pressing them nearly to Riku’s chest and forcing his hips to roll up off the bed. Both his hands came around to grab his ass, thumbs dragging up between the spread cheeks, over his entrance and --

The noise he made was certainly _not_ a yelp. It was to Axel’s credit that he didn’t catch a knee to the face when Riku jerked suddenly against him. He sat back, letting the blond’s legs fall to a more natural position.

“Ahh… Don’t catch often then, huh?”

“What? No, I--” Riku licked his lips and tried again to speak.“What?”

“That’s fine, I’m _flexible_.” The way Axel said the word ‘flexible’ made Riku shudder as his whole body flushed. Innocent words had no business sounding that filthy.

He had no doubt that Axel could make anything sound filthy, if he wanted to.

There were suddenly an awful lot of things that he wanted to hear.

He could not for the life of him think of anything to say.

Axel unfolded his long, long legs from under himself and moved to straddle Riku instead. He ran one hand up the blond’s chest and then planted it for balance as he reached behind him to take hold of Riku’s cock and line it up.

“Wait, don’t you--” The rest of Riku’s words disappeared as if they’d been punched out of him as Axel sank down on him. Long red lashes fluttered as he inched further down with minute thrusts. His progress was marked by small moans until at last he was fully seated, flush with Riku’s lap, and he growled in contentment.

“Ahh-- yeah, there we go…”

Fucking _Christ_. ‘Intimate’. Yep. Sure was.

Axel shifted from side to side as he spread his knees wider and Riku’s hands instinctively reached for his hips to steady him. The redhead above him stilled, eyes cracking open and immediately focusing on his hands. Now self-conscious, Riku slowly slid his hands away, letting them come to rest  at the other man’s knees instead. Axel hummed a little laugh and tilted his head to one side, looking down at the blond.

“Oh, you’re _cute_ …” he purred.

God, this was how Riku died, he was sure of it - from embarrassment induced spontaneous combustion if nothing else. Axel leaned forward and kissed him softly, distracting him just enough that the first gentle motion made him whimper. There was something to be said about pre-lubed condoms, if he’d had the brainpower to think on it. As it was, he didn’t even connect it with the smooth easy slide around his own cock. Instead he could only latch onto the feeling of the trails left along his belly as Axel thrust his hips in a steady gentle rhythm.

“Did you-- did you plan on this happening? Before you even got to the club?” Riku asked breathlessly. Axel slowed gradually until he was at a painstaking crawl. Riku bit his lip and was sure he was carving crescent moons into the backs of Axel’s thighs.

“Oh, I _always_ plan ahead when I’m going to pick up strangers in nightclubs.” And then he rolled his hips sharply, taking up Riku’s entire length in one smooth motion, clenching as he did so. Riku _keened_.

Something touched at his chin. Riku cracked open his watering eyes. Axel was leaning over him, weight propped on one forearm above Riku’s head. He had bent in half, back arched and hips cocked to still keep Riku inside him.

It would be unfair to compare the word ‘flexible’ to this man.

“That’s a good noise, I hope.” Axel purred, tracing the line of Riku’s jaw. For the first time since entering the apartment, Riku managed to say exactly what he was thinking.

“Are you _always_ like this?” Axel smiled broadly then planted his other arm on the bed and adjusted his weight so he was resting on his elbows, taking up Riku’s entire field of vision. He let his weight fall, pressing their bodies together.

“Only when I’m having a good time.”

It wasn’t that much weight - it couldn’t have been - but all the air left Riku’s lungs and he didn’t bother to draw more in. He couldn’t. Axel kissed him - breathless and frozen in time, and he was utterly helpless. He didn’t breathe again until Axel had peeled away to sit up, now moving recklessly fast, chasing his own pleasure. The surge of air that flooded in felt more like a loss, and it shattered him. His back bowed upward as he unraveled, coming more undone with each shuddering breath, as if even that was too much for his body to handle. Axel came above him with a cry, arching his back and bearing down and riding out his last shakey jerks.

When they both finally settled, Axel arched further, rising up on his knees a bit and easing himself off Riku. The redhead shifted forward, resettling on the other man’s lap. He breathed heavily, in and out several times, before curling inward to bring his and Riku’s faces together. Had they been a couple, it was the kind of moment that would have been appropriate for a long, romantically charged kiss. But instead Axel just rested their foreheads together, and they both breathed the same air for a bit.

~*~*~

It was Axel who moved first, straightening up and running a hand through his hair. The precise spikes were falling apart, the gel that kept them upright and together worn away by sweat and heavy petting. He was just as pretty in disarray as he was put together. Maybe more so. But maybe Riku was a little biased in favor of ridiculous spikey bedhead. With only a bit of light filtering through the narrow window, red looked brown, and messy brown hair was definitely something that Riku liked.

“ _Fuck_ …” He gasped as Axel slid off him. Every inch of his skin had lit up for a moment, shattering any cohesive thoughts he might’ve been collecting. He heard Axel snort with laughter and then the snap of elastic rubber.

“Hey, I’m gonna take a shower. Do you need anything?” Riku closed his eyes and slowly shook his head. There were still sparks under his skin and behind his eyes.

“Did you want to stay the night?” Axel called from the bathroom. “You don't have to, but I’m letting you know it’s no problem if you do.”

Piecing together a coherent thought was still difficult. He didn't say anything and Axel didn't press for an answer.

The shower ran and stopped, as did the sink with the telltale sounds of a toothbrush. When Axel came back to the bedroom, he was tying his wet hair into a loose braid.

“You much of a cuddler?” He asked, a hair tie held between his teeth.

Riku thought about it. He _did_. And instead of answering, he felt himself blush and immediately smothered his face with a pillow.

“That’s fine,” Axel said, sounding genuinely unbothered. The other man kicked his way under the covers and settled into his half of the bed, leaving Riku alone.

Which wasn't actually what Riku wanted. His heart was still chasing after that feeling, the nameless one that came from having Axel physically weigh him down and bar him in with his arms.

_Fuck._

He scooted closer to the center of the bed, just infringing on Axel’s half, and hoped the other man got the message.

It took a moment, but Axel hummed happily and rolled over to half drape himself over Riku’s back. He was warm and solid, but not stifling. Riku relaxed a bit and snuggled closer. Axel reciprocated by nuzzling the back of his neck, tracing down Riku’s arm until their hands found each other and loosely clasping them. Riku took the initiative to instead thread his fingers between Axel’s and was rewarded with another happy hum. It was so unlike every other one night stand he’d had (not that he’d had many to compare it to). The idea of processing the events of the night was exhausting to even contemplate, and it was the last push he needed to fall well and truly asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -jazz hands-  
> Ahahah...there's,,, so much more,,,  
> Like I said, the premise got super out of hand. It's going to be so much longer than originally intended...


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm gonna try for updating once a month - in whatever chunks makes sense as a chapter break. This is a shorter one, but it doesn't have a cliffhanger.  
> And oh boy, look - conflict :D  
> Don't try this at home kids! Talk to your partner(s) about shit.

Riku had always been a light sleeper, so the next morning he awoke to the sound of a door opening and slamming shut. There was the thunk of shoes being kicked off and the clatter of keys being dropped on a hard surface. It took him longer than he would have liked to remember where he was. Comfortable bed. _Very_ comfortable bed mate. He reached up to gently shake the arm still draped over him.  They grumbled and held Riku tighter. What was their name? A-something. Axel? Yeah, that was it. He shook Axel’s arm a little harder.

“Hey… your, uh...whoever is back.”

“Hmm?” Axel leveraged himself up a bit to listen for a moment. “Oh, that's just my boyfriend.” He settled back into the pillows at the same time Riku catapulted away from them.

“Your _what_?!” He hissed. Axel blinked at Riku, rubbing his eyes blearily.

“Relax dude, it’s chill; he knows.”

“ _He_ **_what_ **?” Axel just stretched and yawned, tossing his long legs over the side of the bed and stretching again as he stood. He plucked a pair of underwear off the floor and put it on, somehow without breaking stride. He left the door open after he stepped through it, allowing the noise to drift in freely.

“Hey babe, welcome home.” There was the sound of a kiss, and then the banging of pots and pans. Axel reappeared in the bedroom doorway a moment later, nonchalantly pushing the door open further, as though he didn't have a naked stranger in his bed and his boyfriend in the other room.

“Hey, do you want breakfast?” Riku spluttered and gestured emphatically with both hands to the door. Axel blinked a couple times, and looked over his shoulder into the apartment. He looked back at Riku.

“I told you dude, it’s fine.” Riku scrubbed his hands over his face. Holy _shit_.

“Just… just give me a minute to get dressed.” Axel disappeared from the doorway, and Riku heard some muffled signs of conversation. As far as he knew, there was only the one way out of this apartment, and he was going to have to go straight through the living area to get there.

 _...Fuck_.

He rolled out of bed and threw on his clothes, not bothering with socks or underwear - instead he wadded them into a ball to carry with his shoes. He hesitated behind the open bedroom door. Maybe... he could just wait until they were distracted, or had gone somewhere else...

Oh, who was he kidding. He didn’t know how big the apartment was. There might not even be any other rooms. He was just going to have to go for it, like ripping off a bandaid. He took a deep breath and held it, and crossed the threshold.

Axel was leaning comfortably over the breakfast bar, chatting with a tired looking man across from him. Once he caught sight of him, Riku had been prepared to make a beeline straight for the door, but he nearly tripped on his own feet when he saw Sora in the kitchen.

Or no, _not_ Sora. Much shorter, much _blonder_ hair was styled into something only artistically messy compared to Sora’s perpetual bedhead, but the other similarities were too eerie for Riku to shake. The height, the face shape, even the bottomless blue of the eyes (because Riku would recognize that color even across the room). Riku’s appearance caught the newcomer’s attention, which halted his conversation with Axel. The redhead looked over his shoulder and smiled.

“Roxas, this is Riku. Riku, Roxas.” He said amiably, gesturing to them each respectively. Roxas gave a slight incline of the head, but didn’t say anything.

Neither did anyone else.

“I need to go,” Riku finally said, compressing the sentence into almost one word. He made a dash for the apartment door, reaching for the doorknob.

“Woah, hey, wait. Before you go--” Axel edged out from behind the counter and beat him to the door. The redhead uncapped a sharpie with his teeth and took hold of Riku’s outstretched arm. Riku took it back when he was done, staring in confusion.

“My number,” Axel explained with a wink. Then he reached behind him and opened the door, smoothly stepping aside and gesturing for Riku to continue. Riku looked from the string of numbers written down his arm to Axel’s easy, friendly smile. He looked back at the numbers, heat building in his face. He started to look toward the kitchen, but couldn't bring himself to look at Sora’s look-alike, so instead he nodded once to no one in particular and quickly shuffled out into the hallway.

He ended up shuffling all the way down to the building’s lobby before he actually put his shoes on, and even then he sat around on the stairs contemplating what to do. He had a phone number written down his arm in marker, was wearing the same clothes as yesterday, and was sorely in need of a shower.

And for someone to remind him why the _fuck_ he thought it would be a good idea to go to a nightclub.

~*~*~

 _ >>Can I come over _?

What he got in response was a string of positive affirmation emojis, which meant Sora was just waking up. He’d probably be all the way awake by time Riku got there. Sora had picked the club for last night so that neither of them would have difficulties traveling, and based on how short the walk was last night to Axel’s, he couldn't have gone far.

He found his way back to the club, and from there to the bus stop. He spent the bus ride mindlessly tapping his phone against his rapidly bouncing knee. His thighs were sore, and it bothered him. They _shouldn't_ have been, considering what he did last night wasn't _hard_ \--

Maybe he was just out of practice. It _had_ been a while, since he last --

No, it was the dancing. That was it. That _must_ be it. He didn't stretch or warm up, and he tried too hard to copy the moves of someone more experienced than he was, that was all.

Yeah… that was all.

Riku let himself in with the key Sora had _insisted_ he take when he first got the place. It was an illegal key actually, but Sora had never been the type to let something so trivial as law get in the way of his friendships.

“Sora?” He called. There was no sign of his friend, but the little studio didn't have a lot of places to hide.

“Down here!”

Riku followed the voice to find Sora laying on the floor behind his couch. He was laying on his stomach with his blankets tangled around his legs, wearing only pajama pants. Goofbert was happily wedged between his arms, acting as a pillow for Sora’s head while his owner played with his phone. Riku traced the defined muscles of Sora’s exposed back with his eyes and his thoughts wandered back to last night with Axel. He wondered what Sora would look like, flexing the same way Axel had when he--

 _No_ , no no no. No. Absolutely not. That was off limits. Sora was his best friend - _only_ his best friend - always had been, and was most definitely _not_ interested in that way.

“How’s Goofy?” He asked, eyeing the fat dachshund in Sora’s arms. He hoped the tightness in his throat didn't translate to his voice. The dog wagged his tail at hearing his name.

“Tired,” Sora answered, “But glad to be home.” It looked to Riku that that applied more to Sora than his dog, but he kept that to himself.

“What about you? What’d Kairi’s face look like when you got back? Is that why you’re over?”

“I, uh...I haven't been home yet…”

“WHAAAT? YOU STAYED OUT ALL NIGHT?!”

“I mean... _kind_ of…”

“What do mean _‘kind of’,_ you haven't been home yet! That totally counts as staying out all night!”

“Well, um...I didn't exactly stay _out_ …”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Riku looked askance and fiddled with the folds of fabric in his hands. Then he slowly pulled his marked arm out from under his folded jacket and held it up for Sora to see. The brunet’s eyes went wide.

“Oh holy _shit_ ,” Sora whispered. “Kairi is going to _flip_.”

*~*~*

Kairi did not, in fact, flip. Mainly because Riku opted not to tell her. He made use of Sora’s shower while he was there and scrubbed Axel’s number off his arm as best he could (after transferring it to a piece of paper, now safely in his wallet). It wasn't obviously a phone number by the time he was done, but if he tried to erase any more of the indelible ink he was going to rub his skin raw.

Sora had haltingly offered him a long sleeved shirt to wear home, when it had become clear that Riku was trying to hide all evidence of the previous night. Riku gladly took him up on the offer. Kairi wouldn't even notice he was wearing Sora’s shirt; it was a common enough occurrence between them.

He showed up at his own apartment around 11, wearing mostly clean clothes, and definitely not smelling like sweat and alcohol. As far as he was concerned, it was just a normal Sunday. Kairi poked her head over the couch as soon as he stepped through the door.

“Oh, there you are! Where were you? I didn't see you at all this morning.”

“I was with Sora,” Riku half-lied. “He had to take Goofbert in to the vet ER last night, did he tell you?” Kairi sat up to cross her arms over the back of the couch and rest her chin on them, looking worried.

“No, I haven't heard from Sora since yesterday. Is Goofy okay?”

“Yeah, he’s fine now. It was a Styrofoam takeout container with a moldy burrito in it - Goofy ate both.”

“Oh wow...Poor Goofy… Poor Sora! How is he? That must’ve been so stressful!” Riku couldn't help but smile at Kairi’s boundless compassion.

“Honestly Sora looked worse than his dog. I think he was up most of the night cleaning after they got back. His floor was unusually spotless.” Kairi smiled back at him.

“Our Sora doesn't do anything by halves, does he?” Riku tucked his shoes into the coat closet and toyed with the hem of his borrowed shirt, where Kairi couldn't see.

“No, he really doesn't.”

~*~*~

“Kairi, what do I do with a stranger’s phone number?” They were sprawled out on the couch together, Riku slouched in one corner and Kairi with her legs across his lap. She answered without looking away from her phone.

“I don't know, use it? Delete it?”

“What if it’s an attractive stranger?” Kairi glanced up at him.

“How attractive are we talking?” Riku smirked more out of habit than anything.

“At _least_ an 8, on a bad day.” His roommate perked up and abandoned her phone in favor of clamoring to look over his shoulder.

“Then you _definitely_ use it and you ask them for a selfie so I can see.” Riku smirked. Axel seemed like the type to have a plethora of flattering selfies, so that probably wouldn't be hard to get.

All in all, this was a much tamer reaction than what Sora predicted. So maybe it wasn't really a reaction to the _whole_ story, it certainly wasn't _flipping_ and that was good enough for Riku. He fiddled with the scrap of paper. He probably shouldn't do this with Kairi looking over his shoulder, in case Axel took his asking for a selfie as, well. Asking for an entirely different kind of selfie. He could send the first message here and then open whatever the response was in his room. He started to enter a new contact.

“Wait, Riku, were you flirting with people at the emergency vet’s?!”

It was instinct for him to answer “No, of course not!” to such an accusation, and the consequence of it fell over him with Kairi’s next question like a cold, sopping wet towel.

“So when did you get some hot stranger’s number?”

Oh _shit_.

“UH….” She playfully shoved at him, pushing her way into his field of vision.

“Have you been sitting on this for a while?”

“No…?”

“So it’s recent?”

“Y-yeah…”

“How recent?”

“It, uh.”

“This weekend recent?”

“Well, um…”

“Riku, I DEMAND to know when you were out flirting with hot strangers!”

Kairi had him pinned down on the couch, with one hand on either of his shoulders and her entire weight in his lap. Small and fierce and earnest and on top of him, staring him down, how could he possibly lie to that?

“Last night. At the club.” The look of surprise that spread across her face was nearly identical to Sora’s, Riku had the passing thought that he was surprised they weren't related. (What if Roxas turned out to be…? Oh no, that was a rabbit hole he was _not_ going down.)

Kairi fell backwards, shrieking. She kicked her feet rapidly in the air as her shriek turned into a squeal and then small hiccuping laughter.

“You went! You went to a club! And you got someone's number!! Tell me! Tell me EVERYTHING.” Riku covered his face.

“Oh my god, Kairi, _no_.” Kairi was now gently kicking at him instead of the open air.

“Riku! You can't just drop that kind of news and NOT give details! TELL ME!”

He had always had a height advantage on Kairi, and he put it to good use - leveraging her off him so he could stand and bolt for his bedroom. His long legs ate up the ground in the time it took Kairi to leap off the couch after him. He slammed the door and locked it just seconds before there was a loud thump and then banging on the other side.

“We LIVE together Riku, you can't avoid me forever!” Riku sighed and slid down to sit on the floor.

She was right, but she had to be up way earlier for work than he did, so he only had to hold out until she fell asleep. After that, he’d have until he got home from work the next day before they saw each other again. Maybe he could sort some things out by then.

Maybe.

*~*~*

He hadn’t actually typed out a message yet. Now that he was safely shut in his room, he _could_ send whatever he wanted, without fearing that it’d be seen by unintended eyes.

He ended up just asking the most relevant question: confirming who was on the receiving end.

_ <<Axel? _

_ >>waddup _

_ <<This is Riku. _

_ >>YOOOOOOO_  
_ >>NO SHIT SON, I DIDNT THINK ID HEAR FROM YOU WHAT WITH HOW YOU LEFT LOL_  
_ >>Didnt mean to scare you with the whole bf thing_  
_ >>shoulda been more upfront about it, sorry :(  
_ _ >>You doin alright?_

_ <<I’m okay. _

He frowned at his phone and sent a quick amendment.

_ <<I think. _

_ >>You THINK? Whats up dude? _

_ <<Can I ask some questions? About your relationship, I mean _

_ >>Lmao, sure. Fire away _

He’d had a number of things in mind he wanted to know, but that just kept cascading into a lists of tangential questions. They all really boiled down to one thing, so that's what he typed.

 _ <<Why, I guess_ 

_ >>Youre gonna have to be a little more specific lol _

Riku rubbed his eyes. More specific, right. But not too specific. He rewrote his message four times before he finally sent it.

<< _You have a boyfriend. You live with him, even. But you just...bring home strangers for sex?  
__ <<Isn’t that... cheating?_

_ >>Hm. Alright, this is gonna be a big one so hold on. _

Riku put his phone down in preparation to let Axel type, but instead it vibrated at steady intervals as a long series of short individual messages came in.

 _ >>First off, its not ‘cheating’ its an open relationship. Got that memorized?_  
_ >>It was a mutual agreement. We talked about it a lot, figured out our rules._  
_ >>We were never very ‘active’ to begin with, if you know what I mean, Roxas aint that kind of guy._  
_ >>But I most def AM, and I got NEEDS, you know?_  
_ >>Our schedules just dont line up the way they used to either which just made it harder_  
_ >>So it was like ‘hey, if I aint getting this here, can I get it somewhere else?’_  
_ >>But I wasn't about to break up with him because of something stupid like work hours or differences in sex drives.  
_ _ >>So we figured it out. It works for both of us._

It felt like it would be condescending to ask ‘Are you sure’ after all of that, but he was filled with the need to get an actual written confirmation. He sent it anyway.

_ >>Lol Roxas and I have been together a long time. Yes, were sure. _

He was surprised when Axel added a ‘ _Are YOU sure?’_

Riku took a long, deep breath and mulled it over.

 _ <<No, not really.  
_ _ <<It's a lot to get my head around._

 _All_ of last night was a lot to get his head around. It _should_ have been him and Sora, getting drunk and dancing and who knows what else but WOW, was _that_ a forbidden pathway. Time to think about something else.

_ <<I had a good time with you. _

And that was true. Mind-blowingly awkward morning after aside. He half smiled at the memory; even that had been kind of fun, in hindsight. A wild ride, from start to finish. 

_ >>but…? _

_ <<No but. I never said anything and wanted to make sure I did. It was fun.  
_ _ <<All of it._

 _ >>Oh!_  
_ >>Well._  
_ >>Youre welcome  
_ _ >>It was my pleasure ;)_

Riku smiled wider. He spun his phone in one hand as he waited for the unexpected giddiness to subside. As far as follow ups to one night stands went, that had gone well. His phone buzzed again, and there was a flutter of... something. Anticipation, maybe?

 _ >>Hey, be real w me though  
_ _ >>You gonna ghost me?_

His smile evaporated as he read the new message again. What did that even _mean_?

So he asked.

_ >>You know, stop messaging cold turkey? Never reply again, conveniently lose my number? _

Riku made a face at his phone screen. Was that really a thing that people did? That seemed like more trouble than it was worth, leaving so much unfinished business with someone.

_ <<I hadn't planned on it…? _

_ >>Okay_  
_ >>Cool  
_ _ >> :) _

He couldn't think of anything to say to that, so he sent a thumbs up emoji. Sora would be proud.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -sticks out leggy- Reminder that life is messy and people make mistakes, especially in anything that involves other people~ And when that happens, the best you can do is make amends, try again and try to do better.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is basically all fluff, because the next chapter has Feels (tm). -confetti-

Riku just let it sit like that, neatly and civilly closed. There were times he would open the conversation, thinking of sending something, but _what_?

What do you even text a one night stand who wants to stay in touch after?

‘Hey let’s do that again sometime’? No, of course not.

 

Well…

Alright, yeah, he _could,_ but… Wouldn’t that make it some kind of weird... strangers with benefits situation? Was that really something he wanted...?

A relationship that was just sex - really, really _good_ sex - and nothing else?

 _Was_ that what he wanted?

 

He always ended up backing out and turning off his phone instead. But after nearly a week, fate had enough of his indecisiveness, and the phone buzzed in his hand as soon as he picked it up.

     >> _Hey do you like ice cream?_

Riku snorted.

     << _What kind of person do you take me for?_

     >> _Bitch maybe youre lactose intolerant I dont know!!!  
_     >> _Come eat ice cream with me, I got ditched_

Riku was already walking to get his shoes even as he typed out, ‘What do you mean you got ‘ditched’?’

     >> _One of Roxaseses coworkers called in sick and he had to cover for them :(((_  
     >> _Date night = canceled_  
     >> _Heart = broken  
_     >> _Ice cream = melting and WASTED if you dont get your ass here_

He had his keys in his mouth and the door open before he had asked “Where is ‘here’?”.

Axel sent him a picture of a little handcarved wooden sign hanging off the wall of a building that read ‘Tram Common Treats’, and then a location pin.

Opening the pin showed him that it wasn’t far, all things considered. 8 bus stops and a walk.

     << _I can be there in 20_

His phone buzzed again in his pocket as he hustled down the stairs, but he ignored it. The bus stop closest to his apartment almost always had a bus at quarter til, and he’d be cutting it close.

Once he had made it onto the bus, he checked the message.

It was a selfie of Axel with his face on a table outside, frowning deeply, with an incredibly elaborate sundae sitting on the edge of the frame. Riku smiled, tucking his phone back into his pocket. The flutter of Something was back.

It was nice.

 

The bus dropped him three blocks away from the ice cream shop. The weather was gorgeous and the street wasn’t crowded, so Riku fell into an easy long-stepped stride. This wasn’t a date.

It wasn’t.

Everything was fine.

 

He ended up coming up on the ice cream shop from the far side, which meant Axel’s back was to him as he approached. The redhead was in the process of taking another picture, and was seemingly dissatisfied with the result every time. He must’ve shown up on the screen, because Axel swiveled around mid attempt before Riku could say anything.

“Oh, perfect! Here, take a picture of me swooning.” Axel shoved his phone at the blond’s chest and hopped up on the table to flop across it, flinging one arm dramatically across his eyes.

Riku fumbled with it, accidentally snapping a selfie before he got the camera set to the correct direction and focused on Axel. He snapped a couple to make sure it wasn’t blurry and then held the phone back out to Axel as the other man clambered back into his chair.

“ _Yes_ , awesome, thank you.” Axel immediately began plastering the picture in emoji stickers: tear drops and animated broken hearts and sad cartoon puppies. Riku rounded the table and pulled out the other chair, quietly seating himself. When the photo was finally edited within a pixel of its life, Axel set his phone down and traded it for a spoon. The screen hadn’t even gone dark before a picture popped up on it. Almost the entire frame was of a hand with the middle finger extended. Riku could spy a very grumpy looking blue eye in the corner. Axel glanced at it and choked on the ice cream in his mouth as he started laughing. He picked up the phone again to tap out a quick reply before setting it down again - this time screen face down. He didn’t look at it when it buzzed again. Riku took the other spoon and rolled it in his fingers.

This wasn’t a date.

At least, not for him and Axel.

 

...He suddenly felt very out of place.

 

Riku smacked the spoon against his palm a couple times, trying to center himself.

“So… Roxas, huh?” Wow, _riveting_ opener. Award worthy, even.

Axel met his eyes and took longer than was necessary to pull the spoon out of his mouth. Any seductive bonus that might’ve had was immediately negated by the dopey grin that followed.

“Yeah, Roxas.” Fondness was obvious in his tone. He even sounded a little love struck. Riku felt a faint pang of jealousy, remembering Axel had said they’d been together a while.

“How long you have you two been dating?” Axel tapped his spoon against his chin.

“Two? Three years? Depends on whether you count from when we met, or when we started labeling it.”

“O-oh. So, uh… were you two always like…?” Riku gestured with the spoon, making a twirling motion. Axel snort-laughed and he was a little pleased with himself at that.

“Haha, kinda? We just clicked right away, y’know? Things moved sort of fast - we were strangers, and then best friends and then next thing we knew, we were living together and sharing a bed. Took our brains a bit to actually catch up with what was going on, but… sort of, yeah.”

“He uh… didn’t really seem to like me.”

“Nah...he had just gotten home from work, he was tired. He can be a real sourpuss when he’s tired.”

“What does he do for work?”

“Security. He does a lot of third shift stuff - he’s always been a bit of a night owl, but he has his days where he needs to sleep like the rest of us.”

“Oh, huh. Like...physical security? Like guarding stuff?”

“Like ‘I once witnessed him disarm and take down a would-be robber when we were out once, and it was one if the hottest things I'd ever seen’. Guy's got _moves_ .” Riku's mouth was hanging dangerously open, in equal parts awe and horror at _what the hell had he gotten into._

“ _Seriously_ ? Where'd he learn _that_?” Axel shrugged and licked his spoon clean.

“I dunno. He doesn't like to talk about it.”

“Even to you?”

“Even to me. Just because we live in each other's pockets doesn't mean we don't have our secrets. I ain't gonna push him.”

“Wow,” Riku said quietly. ‘Wow’ didn't even begin to cover it. Here he was, on a not-date with Axel, the human slinky, whose actual boyfriend could probably kill him with this ice cream spoon.

Sure, yeah, this was fine. Everything was fine.

Completely normal.

Disarming a robber, _jesus_.

 

Axel pushed the bowl toward him.

“Eat some ice cream. I can’t finish this all by myself.” Axel ate another spoonful and looked thoughtful. “Or really... I _can_ … I would just regret it.”

Right! Yes. Ice cream. Ice cream was what they were here for, not weird tangents about his one night stand's boyfriend being a character out of a spy movie. Ice cream was _actually_ normal.

Riku lopped off a huge spoonful and immediately gave himself a brain freeze.

He fell forward into his hands groaning while Axel laughed at him across the table.

 

Yep. Totally fine.

(In the end, Axel did end up eating most of the ice cream. He didn’t seem to regret it that much.)

 ~*~*~

The next morning while Riku was at work, his phone buzzed. He double tapped the notification to open it without checking to see what it was. He was in the middle of typing out a sentence and didn’t want to lose the wording. When it was done and the email sent, he turned to his phone.

It was a picture of him. A selfie, even, where he looked startled and slightly blurry. Attached to it was a text message:

     >> _LMFAO, look what I found!!  
__ >>This is your contact pic now, you dont get to say no_

A second later a new picture loaded in the message thread - this one a screenshot of a phone contact. The picture on it was the selfie, zoomed in on his face, but with a sparkle filter.

...There was an eggplant emoji next to his name.

 And there was an ‘OK’ hand emoji next to _that_.

 

Riku set his phone down and covered his face with both hands. If whatever higher power looked after his corner of the universe was merciful, he would be struck down any second.

He did not respond to the text message.

 *~*~*

 Axel started texting Riku regularly whenever Roxas worked outside his normal schedule, which turned out to be pretty often. Most of the time they were wild speculations about what must've happened in order to delay him from clocking out causing him to come home late (early?), but there was a fair share of dramatic selfies and ridiculous staged pictures on the times where Axel found himself unexpectedly alone when the two of them had made plans.

     << _Does it ever bother you? Getting so many rainchecks?_

>> _Nah. Its not his fault_

Personally, Riku couldn’t help but think that it kind of was - at least a little bit. Roxas had to agree to go in when they called him, didn’t he?

Part of him wanted to point that out. But it would be presumptuous of him to think Axel hadn’t considered that. Axel had responded to that question so quickly. It must’ve been something that came up before. He and Roxas had obviously spent a lot of time talking about how their relationship worked. They had it figured out.

Oh god, he wasn’t ruining that was he?

Was he a homewrecker?

 “Who you been texting so much?” Kairi asked. The sound of his roommate’s voice snapped him out of his spiraling thoughts. They had been leaning against each other, but as the movie had progressed Kairi had slumped down more and more to use him as a pillow and take over the couch.

“Huh?”

“I’ve never seen you on your phone so much during a movie.” She gasped loudly and sat up, turning to face him. “Oh my god, it it the attractive stranger? Did you get a picture yet? Show me!!” She lunged for his phone and he caught her with one hand against her forehead.

“Oh my god, Kairi, _stop_.” She laughed while she flailed, struggling in vain to get around him.

“Never!! I told you you couldn’t avoid me forever!”

“Well now I’m just going to hold out longer on principle.” He shoved her back to her side of her couch. His roommate groaned loudly.

“You know what, you ARE no fun.” Riku leaned back and crossed his arms behind his head.

“Yeah, not falling for that this time.”

“Fall for _what,_ Mister Smartypants?”

“Saying something so untrue that I want to prove you wrong.”

Kairi stared at him blankly for a second before outright _guffawing_ and throwing a pillow at him.

“Oh my god, you _doofus_. You read into things too much, you know that?” Riku rolled his eyes.

“ _Pfft._ No I don’t.” ...Did he? He glanced away from Kairi, suddenly engrossed.

“See, you’re doing it right now!” Startled, his attention snapped back to her. Kairi was pointing at his face.

“No I’m not!”

“I’ve known you since grade school Riku, I can tell when you’re lying!” She leaned in, needling him with both her index fingers.

“Not just by _looking_ at me!” He laughed, trying half-heartedly to push her away. But she was persistent and wiggly, and he had a hard time keeping a hold on her anyway.

“I am a paragon of pure hearted intent! I know a lie when I see it!” She shouted, moving from poking to full on tickling.

“Kairi, no, _ack--_ ! Hahaha, _stop_!”

“ _Repent_ , evil-doer!”

“Heheh, fine. FINE. You - haha - you wanna fight dirty?” Riku snatched one of her hands and blew a raspberry on the inside of her wrist. Kairi shrieked and thrashed wildly, grabbing hold of him for balance. The two of them fell off the couch in a heap, the movie forgotten.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really like writing Riku and Kairi as besties. :)


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update; I play on a gay rugby team so I had literally 0 free time during Pride month. It's a long and smut filled one to make up for it.

Everyone has days that just go sideways, and Riku was no exception.

It was a Friday, which should have been a good start. But he woke up groggy and stiff and irritated, and nothing he did seemed to make it any better. Coffee just made him jittery instead of waking him any further, and he found that he had forgotten his lunch in his half-awake haze. The vending machine in the break room ate his money, and then the office internet went out, preventing him from submitting his end of week reports. To top it all off, the bus was late to get him home.

It was the worst Friday he’d ever had.

When he finally got home, he decided Fuck This, he was going to literally run away from his problems. At least for a while.

So he changed into his workout gear, plugged his phone in to charge and left a note to Kairi that he couldn’t be reached, and stepped outside.

It was hot and muggy, the temperature having steadily rose all day. The sky was a gorgeous and clear blue, with no promise of rain. But insufferable heat or pouring rain, whatever, it didn’t matter - it wasn’t like the day could get any worse.

(He was of course, wrong.)

Riku started into a long strided jog, falling into habit to take him to the park. With no phone and no music, he was left alone with just his thoughts, and rather than dwell on any single one long enough to really be considered ‘thinking’, he churned through them so quickly they all just became static.

It wasn’t necessarily better, but if he could avoid actually hearing what was going on in his brain, he was damn well going to. It was just another form of running anyway.

By the time he got to the park, he was counting his steps in time with his breaths - one, two, three, inhale. One, two, three, exhale. The crunch of his shoes against the pavement strung together the staccato of each foot hitting the ground. It was a steady, comforting noise. He couldn’t hear the static behind it.

It was a delicate thing though, and one word shattered it.

“Riku?”

He looked up from the path. It was pure muscle memory that kept him from tripping on his own feet when he registered that Sora was standing up on the pavement ahead. He had a water bottle in one hand, poised to fill from the drinking fountain station that jutted off the path. His shirt hung around his neck like a towel, dripping water down his chest. The brunet broke out into a dazzling smile when their eyes met. Drops of water beaded on his lashes and on the ends of his hair, sparkling in the sun. Riku’s mouth went very dry.

“Oh! Uh. Hi! Hi, Sora.”

“Out for a run, huh?” Sora flicked his wet bangs to the side, sending some droplets flying like wayward glitter. “It’s a great day for it.”

“Yeah, uh...What...what’re you doing here?” Sora bounced on his toes in excitement.

“There’s an Ultimate tourney this weekend! The qualifiers are today but I thought I was gonna be working and wouldn’t be able to play, but I found someone to trade shifts with!”

“O-oh, that’s...that’s great! Cool.” Sora shifted his weight and Riku’s eyes dropped down to watch the movement. He was wearing black basketball shorts but Riku caught the edge of bright red spandex underneath.

Yeah. Cool cool cool.

“SORA, WE MADE IT!” A tanned, well built man jogged up and threw himself around Sora’s bare shoulders. And wow, he was _gorgeous_. Clearly defined muscles all the way down, a strong jawline, broad shoulders… And here he was just hanging off of Sora like a coat. Riku felt the sweat on his back turn to ice cold pin pricks. Sora’s focus flipped like a switch.

“We did?! We qualified for the brackets?”

“Ya! By one point!” The other man ruffled Sora’s hair with an easy familiarity that twisted a knife in Riku’s gut. Sora whooped with joy and turned to pick the taller man up in a hug. There was more yelling and a lot of mutual back slapping (the sound of which made Riku close his eyes and suck in a long breath through his teeth).

“Ahhh, Wakka I’m so pumped! We made it!”

“Only thanks to you, brother! You scored to break that tie!” Riku swallowed thickly and then faked a cough. Sora paused in his jubilant roughhousing, his attention back on the blond.

“I uh,” Riku pointed vaguely in the direction he had been running. “I should go. Y’know, heart rate. Keep up. All that.” 

“Oh, yeah, sure! Have a good run!” Sora turned back to his teammate and started talking about what other teams had made it. Riku stiffly took a few steps past them and bounced a few times to try psych himself back up for running. He took a couple hops and set off, trying to find his rhythm again. His skin felt too tight. His clothes felt grating. He’d have to try and outrun his own body now.

Sora called out to him again not ten steps later.

“Hey! Wait!” 

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, forcing a friendly smile onto his face before he turned around. He jogged in place, desperately hoping Sora would keep it short.

“See you later tonight?” Sora yelled, both hands cupped around his mouth. “We can do some movies!” There was nothing he wanted to do less at that moment than watch movies with Sora.

At the same time, there was nothing he wanted to do _more_.

Goddammit.

He twisted his smile into a well practiced smirk and yelled back, “Ask Kairi!” 

It wasn’t _quite_ a deflection, not really. Kairi deserved to be asked permission; it was her apartment too, after all. He started taking steps backwards, pre-empting Sora’s response. When he heard his friend half-laugh, and saw him give a thumbs up, he about-faced and floored it.

He sprinted until he couldn’t see the park anymore.

*~*~*

Even a long run home did nothing to curb the restlessness that had wormed its way under his skin. Once he got through the door, Riku made a beeline for the bathroom, all but tearing off his clothes and littering them across the apartment floor.

Riku turned the shower on full blast, left it on the cold setting and stepped right in. He gasped at the shock of the water, but it wasn’t enough to lessen the fire under his skin. He stood panting into the chilled air. He needed to _think_ (about anything other than Sora), he needed to get control of this, it was _fine_ , he was fine, he could do this.

Riku planted one hand against the wall and shoved the other between his legs to palm himself. He bit back a moan as he tightened his grip around his swollen cock, rutting into his own hand.

It wasn’t comfortable and it sure as hell wasn’t satisfying, but it didn't need to be. It only had to take the edge off. (Don’t think about Sora, _don’t think about Sora_.)

He clenched his fist and tweaked his wrist, making himself gasp. More in pain than pleasure, but that - _finally_ \- convinced the rest of his body that maybe now wasn’t the time. Maybe later, after they had --

Ooh, no, absolutely not. He could _not_ see Sora again today until this was taken care of. He needed to do something about it, but how long did he even have?

He just-- He needed to _do_ something. He needed to do-- someone.

He needed to _do somemone._

Fuck.

 

 _...Fuck_.

He threw a towel around his waist and ducked into his bedroom, not even bothering to try and dry off first, which, maybe was a mistake as it took him three tries to type correctly because of the water he dripped on his screen.

 _ << Can I come over?  
_ _ << Like for the night?_

He hadn’t been expecting an instant reply (after all, this wasn’t _Sora_ he was texting… _gah_!), but every second he stared at that screen without a new message felt like an eternity. He started slapping it against the palm of his hand, trying to burn off some of the anxious energy, and when that didn’t work he chucked it on his bed and began briskly pacing along the perimeter of his room, haphazardly putting on clothes to regain his facade of decency.

When he heard it buzz against his comforter, he practically dove for it.

     >> _Yeah sure why not  
__ >> Roxas just left for work_

Oh thank god. He darted around the room, collecting a change of clothes and stuffing it into a backpack - he wouldn't be caught in the same morning-after situation twice.

 

“I’m going out.” Riku said, blowing through their living room. Kairi sat up, hanging over the back of the couch.

“I thought Sora was coming over?”

“He is,” Riku tightened the laces of his shoes a little too sharply, not looking at her. “And I’m going out.”

“ _Riku_.” He flinched at her tone, knowing full well what she would look like. He unfolded slowly to face her anyway. Her mouth was drawn in a tight little frown, the blue of her eyes was usually gentle as water, but now they were fierce and sharp. Riku wilted under her disapproval, but the shame of that wasn’t heavy enough to outweigh his need to run.

“I’m...sorry.”

 

He closed the door quietly behind him.

*~*~*

He was pretty sure there was no way to have made the bus trip any more uncomfortable. Riku sat with his backpack over his lap - firmly pressed down just in case - but Friday night traffic left the bus lurching between stops, and every extra movement made him even more aware of his situation. It was a lucky blessing that no one else needed this stop, and he made it down the aisle, backpack held in front of him like a shield, without having to come in contact with a single other person.

 

One of these days he was going to find a more direct route to Axel's apartment, but until then it was cutting through alleyways from the club. Friday night, just after sundown, and people were starting to flood the streets, forming queues and bottlenecks outside of the business doors all down the block. He wriggled his way between some would-be club goers, trying to hug the wall of the alley so as not to look suspicious to staff members. He was in a plain t-shirt and shorts with a backpack, but considering where he was, he supposed that wouldn't actually do him any favors. He decided to run through his story, in case someone stopped him.

The more he went over it, the less plausible it sounded.

A tense, antsy looking guy with an overstuffed backpack, "meeting a friend" for a "quiet night in", in this part of town?

Yeah, sure, _completely_ legit.

 

Well he couldn't very well say 'I'm going to have sex with a hot guy from a not-so-one-night stand while his boyfriend was working overnight', could he?

He got to the building while he was lost in his thoughts and realized he wasn’t sure how to get in now that he was coming over alone.

 

_ << Should I come up the roof again…? _

_ >> Nah, I can buzz you in  
_ _ >> Door code is 813_

 

Riku wandered past the fire escape this time to come around the front of the building. The first door was unlocked, opening into a tiny foyer hardly big enough to hold two people. The sturdy metal door had a keypad and intercom built into the wall next to it. He punched in the numbers Axel sent him and waited.

The door hummed with an insect-like buzz that only got louder when he opened it. It followed him up the first flight of stairs before cutting off. The stairwell was tightly wound and opened directly into the hallways without doors. He went all the way until the stairs ran out, and ducked into the hallway. It was plain and unadorned, but directly down the hall at the other end was a sign that said ‘ROOF ACCESS’ with an arrow under it. Riku walked toward it until he found the stairs up, and then retraced his steps to what (he was mostly sure) was Axel’s door. He knocked firmly and shifted nervously from foot to foot.

As soon as he saw Axel, Riku seized him by the ears and smashed their mouths together. There was absolutely no finesse to it, compared to the last time they kissed and he might’ve been embarrassed at how sloppy it was if he wasn’t so desperate.

Axel was good natured enough to follow along, letting Riku crash around until he needed to breathe. He pulled back, panting. 

“Ah…” Axel said knowingly, “ _That_ kind of overnight.” He herded Riku into the apartment and locked the door behind them. “What’s got you so worked up huh?”  Axel leaned against the door and smirked at him while he took off his shoes. Fuck, he looked good like that.

 

Riku clasped his hands behind his head and took a deep breath to keep himself from pinning Axel against the door.

“I had… a really bad day.” He admitted

“Drowning our troubles are we?”

“Sorry.” Riku blurted out. “You’re right, it’s stupid.” He sighed and dragged his hands down his face.

“Hey now, I didn’t say _that_ .” The redhead stepped right up into Riku’s space, dropping his voice to a velvety purr. “I had been itchin’ to go hit a club or two this weekend anyway, but I’m _more_ than happy to _stay in_ with _you_...”

The words ‘stay in’ rolled down Riku’s back making him shiver with pleasure. He leaned against Axel, pressing right up against him and grinding. Axel confidently placed a hand on either side of his hips and held their bodies tightly together. He leaned in and kissed Riku soundly, his tongue finding its way into Riku’s mouth like it belonged there. Riku went completely still, eyes falling shut, happy to let Axel take the lead.

It was far too soon when pulled away enough to speak.

“Why don’t you tell me what you want?” Riku licked his lips and opened his eyes before answering, 

“I want... To not have to think.”

“Oh, is that right?” Axel’s hands wandered off Riku’s hips to cup his ass. “Then you came to the right place.” He gave Riku a playful squeeze and got right back to claiming Riku’s mouth for his own.

Riku dove headlong into it. The wet sounds and panting breaths and rush of blood in his ears was more than enough to drown out the lingering staticy thoughts that whispered from the back of his mind.

He couldn’t have Sora.

But he _could_ have this. 

 

Riku rose up on his toes for leverage and snaked his arms over Axel’s shoulders. Axel’s hands gripped tighter as he leaned back just enough to support the extra weight.

And then he dropped Riku squarely back onto his feet. The static returned in full force.

“Come on,” Axel gave him a gentle nudge at the waist, almost shooing him. “Into the bedroom.”

Riku dropped his forehead against Axel’s collarbone and groaned loudly. The redhead untangled his arms and spun the other man around, making the shooing gesture again.

“Less talk, more walk there mister.” 

Riku squinted at the bedroom door on the other side of the apartment. The distance stretched like miles and the lights whined overhead and were so unnecessarily _bright_ , weren’t they? When did that happen--

 

There was a sharp _crack_ as Axel slapped his ass, causing the blond to stumble. He looked over his shoulder intending to glare, but Axel was wearing a self-satisfied smirk like he was born to it, and the redhead give a single waggle of his eyebrows and _fuck,_ it just wasn’t _fair._

“You looked like you were thinking too much,” Axel explained. Riku couldn’t suppress the smile that pulled at the corners of his mouth. He started off toward the bedroom with Axel following just behind him, fingertips ghosting at his lower back.

*~*~*

Axel ushered him through the door and kicked it shut behind them. Quick as a flash, his fingers ducked under the hem of Riku’s shirt and the next thing he knew, it was over his head and around his arms. He shrugged it the rest of the way off and stared down at it. Something in him was thrilled with how easily that happened. He looked up at Axel, who was rummaging in the drawer of one bedside table.

“How do you--”

“Don’t think about it.” Riku swallowed the rest of his words and tried not to, but it was a persistent little train of thought. Could Axel literally rip a shirt off him? Those arms said ‘yes’. Maybe they would get a chance to try…

Axel snapped his fingers to get Riku’s attention. Riku shook his head once to refocus. The redhead was pointing at him from across the room, frowning.

“You were thinking about it. Stop that.” Riku put one hand on his hip and cocked it a bit.

“You’re really holding me to that, huh?” Axel vaulted over one corner of the bed to get back up in Riku’s personal space.

“Well, you said it was what you wanted, and I aim to please.” He took Riku’s chin in his free hand and tilted it up so they could kiss, long and slow. “Now sit on the edge of the bed.” Riku waited for Axel to move and let him by, but when the taller man made no signs of doing so, he ducked away embarrassed. He plopped on the foot of the bed and spread his hands, wordlessly asking ‘what now?’

Axel swept in and gracefully lowered himself to the floor, placing a hand on either one of Riku’s knees and gently pushing them apart. “I am going to _blow_ your _mind_.” Riku’s competitive streak reared its head. He leaned back with a smirk and said, “Oh really? By doing wh--” 

Axel took the corner of the fly of Riku’s pants between his teeth and popped the button. Everything in Riku’s brain ground to a complete halt.

 

Oh, fucking _christ_.

 

Axel tilted his head and pulled back, agonizingly slowly, his half lidded eyes never leaving Riku’s. Fire began to crawl up Riku’s skin. He realized he wasn’t breathing and gasped shakily. Axel let Riku’s fly fall from his teeth and came back to center. He looped an arm over either of Riku’s knees for balance and leaned in, his face just centimeters from where Riku’s boxers were obviously tenting. His hot breath skated across Riku’s skin, setting every one of his hairs on end.

“Y’know, I’ve wanted to get my mouth on you since we met.”

Was steam coming out his ears? It must’ve been.

Axel leaned in and grabbed the edge of his boxer’s waistband in his mouth. Riku couldn’t tear his eyes away as Axel carefully stretched the elastic forward and down, freeing his erection. Axel ran the tip of his nose up the length of Riku’s cock, teasing him with his breath. Riku whimpered and his cock jumped. Axel grinned dangerously and picked something up from near him on the floor. There was a crinkle, and Axel brought his hand up to his mouth.

Oh no.

He wasn’t going to --

Was he?

 

Axel took the base of Riku’s cock in one hand to hold it steady, and then positioned the open condom over the head. Riku could feel the heat of Axel’s lips through the thin rubber. All the breath squeezed out of him.

Oh _no_.

He _was_.

Axel bobbed his head down in one smooth motion, engulfing Riku in his mouth. It wasn’t quite a scream, but it was close.

Riku slapped both hands over his mouth to stifle the noise, but Axel had already heard it, and hummed in approval as he slid back up, tongue dragging heavily along the bottom of Riku’s shaft. At some point, Axel had snuck his hands around behind Riku, and he grabbed both articles of clothing and dragged them down around his ankles. Axel shuffled forward on his knees as he pushed Riku’s apart and up, forcing the other man to kick free of his pants so that his legs were free to wrap around Axel’s shoulders.

Riku bucked his hips and twisted his hands further into the comforter. Axel reached up and found his hands, and pulled them to rest on his own head. Riku immediately tangled them in locks of long red hair, gripping like his life depended on it. Axel bobbed down again, mouth slack and drool oozing out the corners of his mouth. He wanted so badly to hold Axel’s mouth there and just fuck up into, but he was already seeing stars and couldn’t maintain a rhythm even if he tried. So he held on, and let both his own body and Axel do as they pleased.

He gave a few weak, irregular thrusts, but was mostly frozen in place, spine arched, hands still clenched in Axel’s hair. He didn’t mind at all when Axel grabbed him by the ass and pulled him forward off the edge, forcing him to lay against the bed. When Axel started swallowing around him, he bucked wildly, the leverage from Axel’s shoulders being under him letting him arch almost completely off the bed.

The sounds were so wet and loud he didn’t hear the click of a bottle. Axel’s warm hands kneaded into the muscles of his ass, pulling his cheeks apart. Something wet found its way between them.

And _oh_ . Oh, that was-- That was _something_. That was purposeful, for sure, not just the excess spit that slid down from his cock. Riku was surprised at himself for rocking back towards it. Two of Axel’s fingers, slick with lube, pushed back. There was a smack as Axel pulled all the way off his cock with a gasp.

“Can I?” The other man’s normally smooth voice was gravelly and _jesus_ that only made it better.

Riku nodded frantically. It was the only answer to give. Axel growled gently, “Let me hear you.”

“ _Yes_ , please, Axel, _god_ **_yes_ **.”

The first finger already had him keening as it worked in and out of him shallowly. Axel ducked down again and mimicked the motions of his hand with his mouth, hardly taking any more than the head of Riku’s cock into his mouth. As his finger probed deeper, he mouth ventured lower and lower. By the time he was getting the entire length again, he had Riku’s hips thrusting in a steady rhythm, into his mouth and then back onto his fingers.

Riku was _so_ close - all his edges felt fuzzy, like he couldn’t tell where he ended. The only places that mattered were where Axel as touching him, because that contact was so, _so_ good and he was so, _so_ close, just a little faster, just a little more--

Axels’ second finger found purchase and his mouth backed off to start the whole process again.

Riku choked on air, completely helpless to the redhead’s ministrations. His mind went completely blank, and he forgot about the concept of time. There was nothing but wet, hot touch and movement.

 

It was less of a climax and more of a singularity - every part of him felt it all at once. There wasn’t a build up, just an explosion of sensation as his vision went white and sparks crackled under his skin and every bone he had dissolved. His nerves fired uselessly as his body couldn’t process the signals, and without the guidance of his brain he slumped forward as an uncoordinated heap.

Just as he began to slide off the bed, Axel surged upward and gathered Riku in his arms.

“Oh, shit, whoops - Caught ya!” He laughed as he lay the shorter man out on the bed. Riku gulped in air while Axel tidied up. It was just noise to him - noises didn’t mean anything now.

“Now, let’s get you to the shower.” Riku made absolutely no attempt to resist as Axel hauled him to his feet. His legs buckled under him as he first stood, but Axel held him close around the waist and half carried him into the bathroom.

It was a full tub, instead of a standing shower, and Axel deposited Riku right in the bottom of it and started to run the water. He pulled the curtain out around the outside rather than deal with it along the inside. He shucked off his own clothes and got in behind Riku. He leaned over the blond to switch the water to the showerhead and grab a loofah. Riku moaned as the warm water fell over him. There was a burst of a fruity scent as Axel began scrubbing with the loofah. He soon started to sway in time with the motions.

Axel washed his entire back, and down his arms and over his thighs, then pressed in close to scrub Riku’s chest from behind. He kept one arm tightly around Riku’s chest while his other hand dipped between his legs and began to gently stroke him. Riku jerked and cried out, long past being capable of words. His hands scrabbled ineffectually to find something to hold onto in the slick shower.

“Shh, shh… I’ve got you.” He kissed wetly behind Riku’s ear, tracing small shapes with his tongue. “Relax, I’ve got you.” Riku managed to hook his shaking fingers around Axel’s arm that was braced across his chest and sank bonelessly against him. It wasn’t long before he was a shuddering mess, mewling at every touch. He came again with a violent jerk, Axel’s support the only thing keeping him from crumpling forward into a ball.

“Yeah… there you go…” Axel whispered into his ear. “That’s a good boy.” The words sent another shiver of pleasure down Riku’s spin, a cold contrast to the hot water and the warm body along his back.

(Was that shower spray or was he crying? He couldn’t tell.)

Axel kissed his cheek and held him even as he reached to turn the water off. He was in a complete daze while Axel pulled back the shower curtain and pulled a pair of towels toward them. He stared blankly at his own hands while the other man dried them both off, and had no idea what to do with himself when Axel stood him up and helped him out of the bathroom. He just stood in the doorway with a towel wrapped around his shoulders while Axel brushed his teeth and then shepherded him toward the bed. Axel peeled the towel away from him, discarding it on the floor, and then gently pushed him to sit on the bed. He blinked when the lights went out, trying to adjust to the change.

“Hey, come here.” Riku turned toward the sound. There was just enough light from the streetlights outside filtering in through the narrow window for him to see Axel already under the covers, with one hand outstretched. The other man patted the open bed next to him, where he had pulled the blanket back. Riku crawled toward him. Axel tucked them both in, wrapping himself around Riku for good measure. Riku snuggled against him, breathing in the smell of soap.

As soon as he shut his eyes, he was asleep, without a thought.

*~*~*

Riku heard the bedroom door open but didn’t hear it close. He blinked awake, peering into the grayish darkness of the room. The bathroom light was off. Axel was still tucked against him, warm and solid. That only left…

The bed dipped on the far side, and the comforter rustled as it was tossed aside.

Shit. Right. It was morning.

“I should go…” he mumbled, shifting around to try and push Axel off him. Axel’s arms only tightened and the redhead rolled over, practically pinning him down.

“Mmmmm noo…” The other man mumbled sleepily. His mouth crept along Riku’s neck, hot and wet, and he went boneless remember what it could do. “Stay...”  Riku huffed.

“Fine.”

Axel hummed happily and rolled onto his back. With one of the redhead’s arms under his head, Riku was forced to roll too, if he didn’t want to have his face lodged in Axel’s elbow. He readjusted so that his head was resting on the taller man’s shoulder, and Axel threaded his fingers into Riku’s hair to keep him there.

Across from him was Roxas, curled tightly into Axel’s side and already dead asleep. The blond of his hair was more apparent in what little light there was. And with his face mostly hidden behind Axel’s chest, Riku could hardly tell that he looked anything like Sora.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 'Fuck Away the Pain' by Divide the Day is on my playlist for this fic and I figured it was about time it started earning its keep. c:
> 
> Next chapter - Riku finally has to interact with Roxas. >:3
> 
> Edit: The person who inspired this fic sent me me 8 texts screaming about this chapter and then said 'I'm a wreck, why have you done this'


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heeeeey, guess who got REALLY distracted by Fire Emblem: Three Houses? It's me!  
> I've surfaced long enough to give you this honking 5k chapter and thank you for your patience. <3

Riku woke again the next morning to find Roxas staring at him from the other side of the bed. The other blond was laying not an arm’s length away, and Axel was nowhere to be seen.

Jesus, what was he even supposed to say, waking up next to boyfriend of the man who fucked him senseless last night?

“Um… hi…” Roxas blinked at him slowly and then grunted and rolled over, taking most of the blankets with him as he curled up.

It was then that Riku became aware that he was very, _very_ naked. He bolted upright and threw himself off the bed, tripping over his own backpack that had been carefully set on the floor nearby, under his folded clothes from yesterday.

His backpack.

Right.

He scrambled for it, tearing out the first things he touched and struggling into them as he rolled on the floor rather than risk standing. Only once he had both his top and bottom half covered did he peer back over the edge of the mattress.

Roxas had cocooned himself into a lump on the far side of the bed, utterly unmoving. Cradling his bag and discarded clothes like a stolen relic, he crept to the far side of the bedroom toward the door, watching Roxas the whole time. When the other man showed no signs of stirring, Riku darted through the door.

Well here he was again: standing in front of Axel’s bedroom, wad of clothes in hand, staring into the kitchen. Across the breakfast bar he could see Axel manning the stove… wearing nothing.

Or, almost nothing - Just an apron. There were thin lines of black across the redhead’s shoulders and waist suggesting the ties. (Please let him be wearing an apron.) Axel leaned sideways, reaching for something on the far side of the counter and okay, actually, Riku could get behind just the apron. He was certainly behind the view.

Something slid out of his hasty bundle and thumped against the floor, making Riku jump and Axel to peer over his shoulder. He grinned as Riku sheepishly scooped the pants up from the floor.

“Good morning!” 

“Hi…”

“You staying for breakfast this time?”

Well...Roxas already knew he was here. He didn’t know if Sora had stayed the night at his own apartment (and he sure as hell wasn’t about to text either Sora or Kairi to ask). What harm could it do to stick around for some free food?

“Sure, why not.” He sat on one of the tall chairs in front of the breakfast bar. Axel beamed and turned back to the stove momentarily to flip whatever was in his frying pan. It smelled like egg and vanilla.

“Something to drink?” He asked, stretching for one of the higher cabinets to get a glass. Riku hungrily traced long lines up and down Axel’s back with his eyes. Yes, 100% behind this apron-only get-up. He carefully balanced his backpack on his lap, this time stuffing his loose articles inside it and checking it was securely closed.

“Water is fine.”

“Ice?”

“No thanks.” Axel pulled a filtered pitcher from the fridge and filled a tall glass with water. He set both on the breakfast bar in front of Riku with a wink.

“I hope Roxas didn’t scare you when he came in.” Riku spun the cold glass in his hand, fingers sliding easily through the condensation. He lied reflexively.

“No, it was fine.” Riku took a sip of water to avoid answering what he thought was inevitably coming. There was a long moment of silence, broken only by the hiss of the frying pan.

Mercifully, Axel did not mention how he tried to leave. Maybe if he was lucky, the other man had been too asleep at the time to remember it.

“He must’ve had a hard night; he normally makes breakfast before he sleeps...” Axel flipped the contents of the pan again and set it aside. “But he’ll be out in a minute. He always wakes up when he smells food.” He cracked open the oven and warm burst of vanilla wafted into the space as he pulled out a baking sheet of french toast. Axel dumped the last few pieces from the frying pan on top and set the baking sheet on a hot pad next to Riku. The redhead was a flurry of activity, rummaging through cabinets to come up with plates and cutlery and toppings. He laid out butter, and honey and cinnamon sugar.

“I’m sure we have maple syrup somewhere, if you want?” Riku surveyed the unfamiliar options.

“No, this is… This is nice.” It was another knee-jerk assurance, but he was relieved to find he meant it. “Thank you.”

True to Axel’s prediction, they had only just finished serving themselves when Roxas shuffled out from the bedroom, still cocooned in the comforter. He made a slow beeline for kitchen and thumped against Axel’s bare back in a blankety lump. Axel turned halfway and patted the top of the blankets fondly.

“Good morning, sleepyhead.” There was a quiet grunt from under the comforter. The mass then trudged around the breakfast bar to where Riku was sitting. Only Roxas’s eyes were visible under the blanket, framed by some sleep-tousled hanks of hair. The blue that was so bright and lively in Sora’s face was made stormy in Roxas’s by dark circles around his eyes and a sleepy squint. Riku held his gaze for a solid minute, frozen in place yet again before Roxas nodded once and slunk around to Riku’s other side.

He considered the food the same way he considered Riku, and then reached for the pile of french toast. He didn’t bother with the extra plate Axel had left out for him - just stacked three slices on top of each other, folded them in half, and stuffed the stack in his mouth. He drew the blankets back up around him, disappearing into his cocoon as he ate. His hand came back out, took 3 more slices, and then disappeared  again back into the folds of the blanket. Apparently satisfied, the whole mass shambled back to the bedroom and quietly shut the door. Riku blinked. And blinked a few more times as the gears of his thoughts caught again. It was like a moment out of time and the clocks had all restarted.

Surely that hadn’t been _real_.

But there was a significant dent in the pile of french toast and Axel was watching the bedroom door with a soft smile. Riku shook himself to rid the last tingling feelings of surrealism.

“I’m still pretty sure he doesn’t like me.” He muttered, and poked at the toast on his plate. He speared a piece on his fork and frowned at it before stuffing it in his mouth.

“Nah, he thinks you’re pretty,” Axel said casually. Riku almost spit out his food. He hadn’t intended to be heard.

“He-- _What_?”

“He thinks you’re pretty,” Axel said again, enunciating the syllables around his own mouthful. “He told me after you left last time.”  Riku spluttered, fumbling with his fork and nearly dropping it. Axel continued on, unbothered. “Said you’re nice to look at.”

“He-- I’m-- Is that why he…?” Riku gestured to his face, mostly at his eyes. Axel nodded, helping himself to seconds.

“Mmhmm.”

Riku’s face burned hot enough he thought he burned the food in his mouth, and was unable to continue eating.

*~*~*

After breakfast, Riku couldn’t think of an excuse to hang around any longer so he made his way back to the bus stop. Axel had said he was welcome to lounge around, but the idea of being idle, especially all day, made his skin crawl (he had tried to offer to help clean up and the man had laughed at him, which was almost as bad).

The first bus came and went, and as he lingered a bit too long on the bench after the second one’s doors were opened, Riku realized that he also didn’t actually want to go home. But he had nowhere else to go, and nothing with him to fill the time, so when the third bus came, for the wrong route, Riku boarded.

It took him clear to the other side of town, and he picked his way back in the most round-about way possible. It was mid-afternoon by the time he made it to his neighborhood.

He let himself in quietly. The likelihood that Kairi was home this late in the day was low. She marked all her weekends off well in advance on a little whiteboard calendar she hung on the back of their bedroom door, and this hadn’t been one of them.

There were the remains of the movie night in the living room and the kitchen - unfolded blankets and pillows on the floor, bowls of popcorn kernels and empty soda bottles on the counter. But thankfully, no Sora.

 

Riku dropped his backpack with a thump, leaning against the closed door, and finally let himself breathe.

This was fine.

He was fine.

*~*~*

He lost himself in a good book and hadn’t been watching the time, so by the time he knew Kairi was home, she was already in his room. Riku nearly fell off his bed, despite her only saying “Hey” softly. She was already in his doorway, a hand braced on either side of the frame. Even if he had made it to his feet gracefully, he wouldn’t have been able to shut her out.

“...Hi.” He said finally, sheepishly re-settling on his bed.

“So what happened last night?”

“I... don’t really want to talk about it....” His roommate lifted her hands from the door frame to cross her arms. She frowned at him.

“It was a real jerk move of you.” He sighed, and didn’t look at her.

“I know, Kairi.” Riku covered his eyes with his hands. _Oh, god, please don’t make this worse._

“Sora missed you.”  _Aaand, there it was._

“Sorry…” It was all he could think to say.

“He’s not mad, y’know.”

Riku groaned out loud and dropped his head onto his knees.

“He’s worried about you; he said you seemed kind of out of it when he ran into you at the park?”

Oh god, the _park_. Riku grabbed a pillow and dragged it over his head. The bed dipped slightly as Kairi sat next to him. Her hand was cool against his arm.

“Riku,” She chided gently. “We’ve been friends _forever_. You know you can tell me anything, right?”

Sure, sure.

But could he really tell his best friend that he was lusting after their other best friend? Especially when there had been something on and off between those friends?

God, what a mess.

And now she was here and fretting over him and he just wanted this to _go away_ , that was _why_ he had run out in the first place!

But this was _Kairi_ , and he couldn’t refuse her. He never could.

 

...Just a breadcrumb then. 

 

He peeled the pillow off and took a deep breath.

“Something...did happen… at the park.” He started slowly. He knew he had her rapt attention by the way she shifted closer. “One of Sora’s teammates came over while we were talking…” Kairi’s hand tightened on his arm as she interrupted him.

“Was he gross?” She asked, suddenly deathly serious. “Sora knows better than to let that stand. If they were being a gross dudebro just say the word, I’ll fight them. The whole team.” The idea of Kairi taking on an entire Ultimate Frisbee team made him snicker. She could bend an ear like nobody’s business. And he’d had to physically haul her away from starting a fist fight before. He had no doubt that she’d win.

“ _No_ , they weren’t being a ‘gross dudebro’. The teammate that came up was nice, Sora likes him I’m pretty sure. He was just…” Riku covered his eyes with one hand again, laughing at himself at bit. He couldn’t believe he was about to say this outloud. But this was Kairi. It would be fine. “He was a ten.” The hand slid off his arm a bit.

“ _Oh_.”

“And he was just like, hanging off of Sora, you know, like it was nothing - showing off. And I got…uncomfortable.”

“Oh?”

“You know, like…” Riku mimed fanning his face. “ _Uncomfortable_?” Kairi’s hands shot up over her mouth.

“ _OH_!”

“And I was just **so** _embarrassed_ , that I just couldn’t stick around. And I didn’t want to see Sora afterward, because…” He rubbed at his face. “Well, I didn’t want him to _know,_ especially if he had noticed at the park, in front of his _team mate_ , cause he has _such_ a big mouth, you know? So I had to go...somewhere else.” Kairi bounced up and down, hands flapping.

“OH! OH, DID YOU GO SEE THE HOT STRANGER?” Riku outright laughed, but it felt hollow in his chest.

“Yes. It was the hot stranger.”

“AHHH!” Riku ran his hand through his hair, half hiding behind his arm.

“So uh, yeah. That’s where I’ve been.” Kairi hopped off his bed, flailing her arms.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to get so up in your business like that! I didn’t realize it would be so, so-- _personal_. I’m--! I’ll just-- Ahhahah, I’m so sorry, I’ll leave you alone!” She flitted over to his door, but turned around with one hand on the knob.

“I _promise_ , not a word of it to Sora.” She held a finger to her lips and winked at him. He smiled back at her. It would look pained, and he knew it, but maybe that was appropriate. Maybe she wouldn’t notice.

 

As Kairi closed his door giggling, the guilt of lying to her like that - even with all the half truths he used - was already churning in his gut. It tasted like french toast and theater popcorn.

 

He’d figure it out.

It was fine.

 

He never wanted to eat french toast again.

*~*~*

Riku started finding ways to not be at home. He threw himself into work, sticking around the office after hours and then taking the long route home. Sometimes he would switch buses when he didn’t have to, or get off a few stops early and wander around.

There were times he wound up outside Axel’s short apartment building without having meant to, but he’d punch in the three digits and get buzzed in. Sometimes Axel would call out to him before he even got to the door, from where he and Roxas were perched on the roof, eating ice cream bars. He’d climb the fire escape instead and hang around quietly, trying not to intrude. He didn’t stay long on those days.

But then there were the visits that ended with him getting home in the wee hours of the morning, sore and showered, and he had to fight to stay awake during work the next day. One memorable occasion left him praying none of his coworkers noticed he was wearing the same shirt two days in a row.

 

A few times had Roxas answer the apartment door instead, and knowing now that the short blond thought he was _pretty_ , Riku found himself blushing under the piercing blue gaze.

Still hardly ever a word of greeting though - it was usually a nod, sometimes a grunt.

 

“Are you _sure_ it’s not that he doesn’t like me?” Riku burst out once, as soon as the door shut. Axel flapped a hand at him from the couch without looking up from his magazine.

“He likes you just fine.”

He spent that visit flopped on top of Axel on the couch, wallowing in doubt, while the other man finger combed his hair while the TV played in the background.

~*~*~

Another Friday rolled around. Heralded by a completely uneventful week, this Friday blurred into the days before it like it was no real Friday at all.  
And like most unassuming, ordinary days, fate laughed at it.

_ >> You coming over tonight? _

Riku started typing a reply but stopped when he realized he was about to typed ‘I had planned on it’.

Riku looked at the clock, and saw he had already missed the bus he normally took back to his own apartment - but he’d be right on time to catch the one that would take him to Axel’s. Under his desk was another backpack that he kept a change of work clothes in, along with a toothbrush.

The pit of his stomach dropped like a stone. He _had_ been planning on it. He hadn’t realized it had become routine for him to not go straight home after work anymore.

_ << I had planned on it, yeah _

His thumbs hovered over the keyboard before also tapping out a follow up.

_ << Is that okay? _

As soon as he’s sent it, new messages are already popping up on his screen.

      _> > Roxas is asleep on the couch, just thought Id warn you_  
_ >> He swapped a shift so he starts at ass oclock tomorrow_  
_ >> Course its okay  
     >> Why would it not be?_

Riku spun his phone around in his hand, trying to recall the past few weeks. He couldn’t remember any time had actually planned ahead with Axel about coming over.

<< _I don’t think I’ve been asking, recently._

He finished packing and clearing off his desk and was out the door by the time the next message came through.

_ >>You okay? _

He stood at the bus stop, staring at his phone, not able to answer.

 _ >> Hey, well talk okay?  
_      >> _See you soon_

Rain broke out exactly as the door closed on the bus, and it grew steadily for the whole drive. After fishing around in his bag and finding that he did not, in fact, have an umbrella, Riku slumped against the window in resignation.

It was outright pouring by the time he got to his stop. Riku took a deep breath before stepping off, bracing for the cold.

He was drenched immediately. Well thank god he hadn’t needed to bring his computer with him; this backpack wasn’t waterproof. Probably wouldn’t have mattered anyway, in this storm - the rain was so heavy he had to lift a hand to keep the water out of his eyes to see. The streetlights had come on, but could barely penetrate the sheets of water and generated mist. He knew the way well enough by now that he probably could have done it with his eyes closed. He trudged forward.

~*~*~

Axel was waiting in the doorway by the time he got up to it.

Riku looked up at him, sopping wet and miserable and just sighed. Axel greeted him with a one armed hug, pulling Riku tight against himself despite him being soaked and dripping.

“I don’t want to think.” He mumbled into the redhead’s bare shoulder.

“Ah.” Axel gently steered Riku into the apartment and peeled his backpack from his arm.

“Here, I’ll put these in the dryer.” Axel disappeared off behind the kitchen, leaving Riku to deal with his shoes. He stuck his tongue out at the squelching noise they made as he tried to toe them off.

“Hey.” The unfamiliar voice made Riku freeze. He glanced up and saw a shock of sandy spikes peeking out over the back of the couch. 

Roxas. He had heard the other blond speak so rarely that he had forgotten what he sounded like.

Roxas motioned lazily for him to come over, yawning as he did so. Riku picked his way toward the couch, trying to strip off his wet socks as he did to keep from slipping. He hovered just on the edge of the shag rug, not wanting to drip on it.

Roxas leaned further over the back of the couch, reaching up and brushing Riku’s wet bangs out of his eyes. His hands were dry and calloused, the roughness of them cutting through the dampness that clung to Riku’s skin.

“Y’look like shit.” Riku scowled and recoiled. His hand traced the same path Roxas’s had, this time firmly tucking the wayward hair behind his ear. 

“Gee _thanks_.” 

Roxas dried his hand by rubbing it through his own hair. “You can relax while you’re here, you know. I don’t mind you being around.” His still sleepy gaze settled on Riku like a pair of weights, heavier than all of his wet clothing already trying to drag him to the floor. Riku looked away and self-consciously ran a hand through his hair again. Water splattered on the hardwood beneath him.

“Go take a shower.” The couch creaked as Roxas settled back down into it, and soon after there were gentle snores rising from it. Riku looked to the other end of the apartment and didn’t see Axel anywhere, so with a huff he headed for the bedroom.

A shower did sound _really_ nice.

~*~*~

Riku lost track of time as the hot water leached the rain’s cold from his bones, the shower spray drowning out the steady drum of the rain on the roof of the building. He stepped out into the steam-washed room and found a fresh set of towels stacked on the counter for him, under his phone. They were still warm from the dryer. He buried his face into the soft fabric, only half using it to dry off. His wet clothes were nowhere to be seen.

With one towel held around his waist, and the other thrown over his head, Riku poked his head out the bathroom door to check the bedroom. Axel was lounging on the bed, scrolling through something on his phone. He looked up at Riku and smiled.

“You look better already.” Riku forced out a laugh and tugged the towel a bit further over his face.

“Yeah. Sorry about uh. Getting water everywhere.” Axel shrugged one shoulder.

“Don’t worry about it.” He patted the bed next to him. “Come here and lie down.” Riku glanced around for his backpack and didn’t find it.

“I uh- I don’t have anything to change into…”

“LIke I said, don’t worry about it.” 

“But--” Axel held up a finger and wagged it.

“Ah ah ah. No buts. Just come here and lay on your stomach. I’ve got a good way to make you stop thinking tonight.”

Every one of Riku’s hairs stood on end, despite the steam pouring out around him from the open bathroom. His knees went weak with memories of the last time Axel set out to do that. His steps to the bed were slow and careful, doing his best not to stumble. He dropped his phone on a pillow and then scooted onto the bed, trying and failing to keep his towel from riding up.

Axel straddled him, a large comforting weight on his hips. Broad hands rested on his shoulders and then they were kneading into the muscles there, sharp and hot pressure taking his breath away. Riku went limp against the mattress as he moaned.

“Told you it’d be good.” Riku gurgled something, unable to muster the strength to flip off the man sitting on him for his smug tone. Axel worked his way down, rolling off his thumbs through to the heels of his hands, inch by inch. When he reached the towel, he swept his hands up the length of Riku’s back all the way to the top and started again.

“Now, I said we’d talk.” 

But was that _really_ necessary? This was _just_ fine, thanks. Riku mumbled out some noises approximating a question, unable to actually articulate the words. Axel ignored him. “You’ve obviously got something going on that’s bothering you - and you don’t need to tell me what it is - but I don’t think you’re dealing with it well.” Riku cracked his eyes open examined the weave of the sheets as he bunched them around his face. He wasn’t hiding, not really. 

“Now don’t get me wrong, you’re a great fuck Riku, and if that’s all you want from me, I’m totally down for us being friends with benefits. But it... doesn’t really seem to be working for you as a coping strategy. You’ve been super cagey recently.”

“‘M not _cagey_.” Axel pinched him.

“Uh, _yeah_ you are. You get real weird whenever Roxas is around, for sure.” Riku pinched a fold of the sheets between to rub between his fingers. It’d be easy to lose himself completely in the contrast between the cool brush of the fabric and the warm slide of Axel’s hands. He closed his eyes and let it help him piece together words.

“He looks like someone I know. A lot.”

“Ah.”

“Like, _really_ similar. Eerie.”

“I _see_.”

“It’s weird.”

“Well we can’t change his face. Especially since _I’m_ rather partial to it. You’ve got a good looking friend if they look like Roxas.” Riku smiled into the sheets despite himself. Axel wasn’t wrong.

“But for _real_ , you gotta learn to chill. He doesn’t have any beef with you; I even know he told you so himself.”

Riku glared over his shoulder. It wasn’t very effective, since he couldn’t quite get Axel in his field of vision. “Did you plan that?” Axel put a hand against his cheek and gently pushed him back against the mattress.

“It’s a small open plan apartment, Riku. I can hear what’s being said in my living room when I’m doing laundry.” Riku’s cheeks grew hot and he smothered them in his elbow.  “Was that what’s been eating you?” Axel replaced his hands on Riku’s back, fanning out his fingers over the shoulder blades and pressing down. Riku sighed as his back cracked under the pressure.

The bed was soft. Axel’s hands were warm. The rain still pattered against the small window and the roof. For right now, the world only consisted of that bedroom, himself, and a wildfire of a man who gave both killer massages _and_ blowjobs. What harm could the truth do him here?

“I’ve been lying to my friends.”

“Yeah? What about?”

“‘Bout you, mostly…”

“Oh _really_?”

“My roommate thinks we’ve only met in person twice, and my best friend thinks you were a one night stand.”

“Sounds like what you need is just to come clean.” Riku groaned into his arms, but Axels dug his thumbs into the tight muscles of his neck and the frustration was swept away by pleasure.

“Telling them you’re getting banged on the regular by a truly fine piece of ass isn’t going to be any worse than whatever it is you’ve been telling them instead.”

“Ugh, I am _not_ telling them that.”

“What, am I _not_ a truly fine piece of ass? Riku, you wound me.”

“No, I-- You’re-- They just don’t need to know _that_.”

“It’s not gonna get better if you don’t talk about it. That’s how life works. Got it memorized?” Riku harrumphed and snuggled deeper into the mattress.

He couldn’t just… _tell_ Sora that he-- what, had a fuck buddy? A-- a boyfriend...?

Sora didn’t even know he-- Did he? They had never really talked about it. It never came up, actually, now that he thought about it, in all their years of being friends. As much as Sora was his best friend, he didn’t have all of Riku’s secrets.

And certainly neither did _Kairi_ for that matter, but... Things were easier with Kairi. Plainer, more clear cut. Maybe it was because they met later, and weren’t all tangled up in each other’s business from the very beginning. She had the same sort of big-hearted compassion as Sora, but a little bit cooler. A little bit steadier. The ocean, instead of the storm. She knew where the boundaries were and while sometimes she would push and pull on them, they were always there.

It was easier to let someone in when you knew you could hold them a certain distance away.

Maybe that was what he was doing with Axel now, too - keeping these two lives separate.

 

“What are you doing tomorrow?”

“I’ve gotta go in to work for a bit in the morning, but that’s it.”

“Do you...want to get lunch with me and my roommate?”

“Why Riku, that almost sounds like a date! _And_ meeting the family!” Riku scrunched both towel and sheet over his head.

“ _God_. Just-- yes or no. And then I’ll text her right now, so you know I did it.” Axel tilted his head back and laughed. He bent forward, flattening himself over Riku’s back and snaking his arms under the blond’s to rest his chin on Riku’s shoulder.

“Yeah, sure. Sounds nice.” Riku his still-damp hair at him, catching him in the eye,and reached for his phone.

_ << Hey Kairi._

_ >> Hey Riku._

_ << You know that guy I’ve been seeing? _

_ >> OMG YES, THE HOT STRANGER??? _

_ << Yeah.   
_ _ << Do you want to meet him? _

_ >> [[ Incoming Call: Kairi ]] _

Riku pressed the phone to his face and sighed into it, smiling. As soon as he had answered, there was a long, high pitched squeal.

“Hi Kairi.“

“OF COURSE I WANT TO MEET HIM YOU DOOFUS!! TELL ME WHERE AND WHEN!!”

“How about we come pick you up from work at noon?”

“YES, YES, YES! OKAY, GREAT, I’LL SEE YOU TOMORROW.”

“Yeah, see you tomorrow.” He hung up and let the phone drop, contorting under Axel’s weight to face him as best he could.

“There, it’s done.” Axel pecked him on the cheek and then ruffled the towel on his hair.

“Was that really so hard?” Riku blew a raspberry at him from under the towel’s edge.

 

That part? No, not at all.

Actually sitting through lunch with Kairi and his he-didn’t-know-what? He might as well try to reshape the moon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Riku needs to learn that it's never nearly as climactic as we expect it to be when we just Adult Up and talk to people about things.
> 
> This fic might have a bit of projection going on. Just a smidge. Y'know. As fics do.  
> But Kairi is fun. I like what I get to do with Kairi next chapter.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been looking forward to sharing this chapter for such a long time and am so so happy to finally get to. C:  
> 

Riku spent the morning poking around Axel’s apartment. He had found a sticky note stuck to his arm when he woke up with the time Axel expected to be home, and no one else around. As he walked around, he roughly finger-combed his wet hair. Having fallen asleep with a towel over his head had given him bedhead to rival Sora’s, and the only way to tame it had been to take another shower. He managed to find the laundry room - or, laundry closet, really. A pair of folding doors opened up to reveal a washer and dryer, side by side, in their own little nook just past the kitchen. They were both top-loaders, with a towel spread out over the lids to catch the water from his backpack, which was hanging from the wire shelf above them. Riku pinched it, rubbing the fabric between his fingers.

He frowned - Still damp. Probably wouldn’t be ready for him to pack everything into by the time they left to meet Kairi. Guess he’d be coming back with Axel after lunch.

His clothes were still in the dryer, so he dug out something to wear and traded out his towel for real clothes. (Man, he was really burning through their clean towel supply… Maybe he owed them a load or two laundry.)

As he stood there, lost in thought and staring into the laundry closet with the offending towel in hand, the door to the apartment opened and Axel’s voice bounced off the walls.

“Hey, I”m home!”

Riku peered sheepishly around the corner to see Axel setting down a gym bag. The redhead was wearing a bright pink muscle tank that showed off his arms and a pair of geometrically patterned leggings that showed off the rest of him.

“Hi!” He squawked, voice cracking. “Uh...weh...welcome...back...”

Axel gave him a wry grin and strode over, dropping a kiss on Riku’s forehead as he plucked the towel from the blond’s hands. Riku shrunk in on himself a bit.

“You’re cute.” The taller man said, moving past him to throw the towel into an empty laundry basket in a separate closet. Riku watched him go by with interest - the leggings may have been mostly black, but the shine of the fabric really picked up every last curve of his hips and legs.

“What kind of place were we going to? Do I need to change?” _The White Rabbit_ was a small café only a short walk from the flower shop Kairi worked at. It prided itself on being a bit outside of social norms, so no one there would look twice at Axel’s athleisure attire. Or at least, not because he was breaking any sort of dress code.

“N-No, that should be…” He swallowed, and nearly swallowed his tongue. “You should be fine.”

“And you told your roommate noon, right? What time do we need to leave?” Riku turned toward the kitchen, checking the time on the oven as he ran the bus times in his head.

“Now, actually.”

“Good thing I showered at work then. You ready?”

“Yeah, just let me grab my phone.”

~*~*~

The bus dropped them off a few minutes short of noon, down the block from the flower shop. Riku pulled out his phone to text Kairi as they walked. He had only just sent the message when he looked up to see a young woman with short auburn hair standing out on the sidewalk ahead of them.

“Oh, there she is.”

Kairi turned, looking up and down the street and when she saw him she waved. And then dropped into a crouch, pointing at him, and _screeched_. Riku’s head swiveled around, looking for what could have made his friend scream like that and came up with nothing.

Except that just behind him, Axel was in the exact same pose, an incredulous open mouthed grin taking up his entire face.

Riku barely had time to utter “...what?” before the two of them were barrelling toward each other, Kairi still screaming. As the two redheads collided, Axel lifted Kairi up over his head, spinning her around.

Riku slowly wandered over, mouth open in disbelief.

“I take it you two know each other already…?” He asked as Axel deposited a laughing Kairi safely on the ground. His friend turned to face him, her blue eyes sparkling.

“Axel teaches that dance class I kept trying to get you to come to!” Axel leaned an arm on Kairi’s head with almost the same kind of familiarity Riku had with Sora.

“Kairi is one of my _favorite_ attendees. She always brings a great energy to the studio.” She blushed lightly and covered her mouth with one hand.

“Awww, you’re so sweet.”

“Dance class.” Riku repeats, looking back over Axel’s outfit.

“One of several! You should come with sometime; you’re pretty good from what I remember.” Axel flourished it with a wink that caught on Riku’s cheeks like a spark on tinder. Kairi gasped loudly.

“Oh my god, that’s _right_ \- you two met at a club. Riku _danced_. Oh my god, we have so much to talk about. Riku, where did you want to get lunch? Is it far?”

“I had just been planning on The White Rabbit…?” Kairi squeaked in excitement, thankfully far quieter than her greeting.

“Yes! I love the Rabbit!” She snatched up each of the men’s hands and immediately set off in the direction of the cafe. “This is the _best_ Saturday ever!”

~*~*~

 _The White Rabbit_ was geared more toward the early morning breakfast crowd, and so was quiet and mostly empty when they arrived. It boasted floor to ceiling windows all along both exterior walls of its corner suite, filling it with natural light at all times of day. It nicely complimented the pastel walls hung with chunky antique picture frames that featured everything from small abstract paintings to typographic art.

They got a large round table toward the back, the wrought iron contrasting with the light wood chairs placed around it. Off to the side was a tea service area, which had a selection of victorian furniture and glass doored cabinets of decorative tea cups.

“Oooh, this is cozy.” Axel cooed as he looked around.

“Oh, have you never been here before? It’s one of my favorite places. Everything is so cute and quirky!” Axel ruffled her hair and she giggled.

“Perfect for you, shortcake.” Riku pushed at his mouth with his knuckles, trying to straighten out the frown that had begun to set in. 

It was fine that they already seemed to be friends. It was a good thing. Them already knowing each other should make this smoother. This was a _good thing_.

Everything was _fine_.

Axel pulled two menus from the decorative center piece and held one out to Kairi. She held up a hand to politely refuse.

“Oh I already know what I’m getting. Everything here is delicious, but I don’t want to split my attention by trying something new.” She instead leaned on the table, her chin resting atop her linked fingers. The blue of her eyes flashed like lightning. Riku held his own menu up between them as a shield. He saw french toast and pointedly turned the page to look at their lunch specials.

“What do you recommend?”

“Well, anything with whipped cream - they make their own here.” Riku could hear Axel’s menu hit the table and decided very specifically _not_ to look up.

“ _Do_ they.”

“Oh yes. The house cream puffs are to _die_ for.” 

Everything was no longer fine.

“We should get some of those.”

“We should!”

“That’s not a complete meal though, that’s just a _snack_.”

“You’re absolutely right. A big guy like you needs something more substantial. Something with _meat_. The breakfast sausage combo is also excellent.”

“I _do_ like sausage...”

Riku was going to die here, in this small cafe. This was his punishment for going to a club. He should’ve known better. He pressed his face against the cool plastic pages of the menu.

“Can you two _not_?” He groaned. Kairi fluttered her eyelashes at him.

“Whatever do you mean Riku?”

“Yeah Riku, what _do_ you mean?”

Riku’s eyes flicked between Kairi and Axel, two treacherous redheads who were both seated across from him in a blatant display of unity. 

“The two of you are the absolute _worst_ ,” He hissed, just as a server approached the table. 

He then had to sit straight faced through Axel actually looking their server in the eye and ordering a sausage combo and a plate of cream puffs - with a _wink_ , which sent Kairi into a fit of snickering. As soon as the server left, Riku slumped down in his seat.

“This was a terrible idea.”

“Okay, okay, fine.” Kairi giggled. “How’s work been Riku? You’ve been staying late a lot.” Axel leaned a bit away from her in surprise, and he turned to Riku as a feral grin split apart his features. Riku slid down in his chair, but the decorative twists of the table legs prevented him from getting out of sight.

“You know, you’ve never mentioned what you do for work.” Riku pulled the menu over the top of his head.

“I’m  a… data analyst…”

“Ooh, very sexy.”

“Brave _and_ sexy, working in that office all day.”

“Incredibly brave - I, for one, could _never_. It would just put out my creative flare, y’know? Ze _soul_ of _oun_ _artiste_.” Axel put on a very thick and very fake accent for the last few words and Kairi laughed so hard she snorted.

“You certainly do! You know, the times after class when you mentioned having someone in your life, I never pictured someone like Riku!”

“Well that’s cause the one I was talking about isn’t Riku.” There was an interesting glub noise from Kairi as she managed to not inhale her water. She swallowed and let out a dainty burp against the back of her hand.

“Is that right?”

Oh _fuck_.

No, he was already dead and this was _Hell_. It _must_ be.

“Yep. My main squeeze is a guy named Roxas. Do you wanna see him?”

“Oh sure!”  She said, sounding delighted. The two redheads scooted their chairs closer together for Axel to show her his camera roll. While the other man was laughing at a story behind one picture, Riku locked eyes with her across the table, and was briefly swallowed up by the color of where the sky met the sea and kept all the secrets of the world.

“So where does Riku fit in all this?”

“Right next to me!” Axel said, leaning  around the table to hook an arm around Riku’s neck.  His long limbs managed to make up for the way Riku was trying to melt out of his chair. “But Roxas seems to like him too.”

“Well that’s good!”

“He _never_ believes me though. How long have you two known each other? Has he always been like this?”

And like a switch had been flipped, Kairi rallied back with Axel against him.

Riku dropped the menu back over his face and prayed that their food would come quickly.

~*~*~

Once the food was delivered, conversation died down considerably with the exception of plates being traded and stolen from. It only took the threat of more innuendos from Axel for Riku to cave in and take one of the cream puffs. They really were delicious - the whipped cream rich with vanilla and a dash of nutmeg wrapped in crisp and airy fried dough. They were a mess to eat, which Axel took an extra special joy in. Even Kairi turned away to take a very long drink of water when he finished with his.

Their server had taken the liberty of splitting their orders apart on separate checks, and while they took Axel’s god awful jokes in stride, they didn’t join in, which Riku planned on tipping them generously for.

He patted down the pockets of his freshly laundered jeans.

And then again a second and third time in quick succession just to make sure.

“Ah, shit. I don’t know where my wallet is.”

“Don’t worry about it, I’ve gotchu.” Axel said as he plucked up Riku’s receipt. Kairi leaned out from behind Axel, grinning like a _maniac_. Riku purposely turned to focus on Axel and ignore her.

“Are you sure? I can pay you back right now on my phone--” Riku quickly reached for his phone only to knock over his water glass, and then fumbling the now wet device onto the floor.  He clapped his hands over his face and groaned. Axel leaned over and pinched his cheek gently.

“Seeing you blush is more than enough.” The pinching disappeared but the burning only intensified. “And look, your phone is even fine! Wins all around.”

“Oh, I _agree_.” Riku peered between his fingers to glare at Kairi, who was holding her own drink aloft in a toast.

This had most definitely been a terrible idea.

Axel ended up taking all three checks for the whole table, which Kairi admonished him for - making him promise to let her take him out to eat there again in return. Possibly after a dance class, from the sound of it. When they parted ways at the cafe door, the tall man swept her off her feet again in their goodbye hug. Her hug with Riku was much more subdued. She whispered “I’ll text you later” and gave him a quick peck on the cheek before taking off at a quick jog back towards her work. Both men waved until she turned around. Axel waved a little bit longer.

“So I think that went well!” He put his hands on his hips and looked down at the blond. “How ‘bout you?” Riku huffed a bit and started walking back towards the bus stop.

“I think this is apparently a very small city.” Axel quickly matched his stride and swung his arm forward to snatch up Riku’s hand.

“It’s a small world, too, after all.” Riku groaned and tried to tug his hand free by stepping sideways.

“Oh my god, _don’t_.”

“C’mon, that song gets a bad rap. Oh! I should do a routine for it. That’d be a fun class.”

“I can’t believe you’re a _dance teacher_.”

“With a body like this? What did you think I did?” Several possible answers crossed Riku’s mind. He clamped his mouth firmly shut and looked down the street to see if the bus was already coming.

“I mean I _guess_ I could’ve been a street performer...Hm...What would my act be…Oh, how about this!” Axel veered toward a nearby street sign. He took hold of it at about shoulder height, hands about an armspan apart, and then lifted himself off the ground. 

Completely. 

The movement made his shirt ride up a little, showing off the incredibly toned abs responsible for this obscenity.

This was absolutely unfair. They were in _public_.

“Axel,” Riku hissed, “Axel, get _down_.” He reached up over the redhead’s waist and yanked, leaning into it, hoping to drag him down. To his horror (and delight), he found that Axel could still support the weight.

Something in his brain short circuited.

Axel folded in half - still parallel to the sidewalk - pulling Riku in toward the sign post. He shifted his hands, starting to drop his weight onto one foot, and the next moment Riku found himself being held against the pole, one of Axel’s legs hiked up around him to pin him there.

God almighty, how was that even possible?

“Or maybe I could do this indoors, on a proper pole…?” Riku spluttered and Axel laughed.

“Now see - I _can_ believe you’re a _data analyst._ That explains so much about you, really.”

“What is that supposed to mean?!” Riku finally found the strength to push the redhead off in indignation.

“It _means_ you need to loosen up more,” Axel came back behind him again and trapped him in a hug.

“And I know a good way to do just that,” He purred, tracing Riku’s ear with his breath. Their bus pulled up just in time to save Riku from anymore teasing, but a gentle nudge at his back nearly sent him face first into the metal steps.

The bus back was much more full than on the way in, but Riku found a pair of empty seats and fell into them. He gestured to the seat next to him when Axel didn’t follow.

“Nah, I’m okay standing.” Axel said, and proceeded to stand exactly in front of Riku so that his spandex wrapped ass was in the blond’s face. Riku planted a hand on it and shoved, which only made Axel start into a backbend rather than get him any further away. A few of the women sitting nearby tittered.

“Why are you so terrible?” Riku tried to glare but both his mouth and his cheeks had betrayed him.

“Excuse you, I am a _delight_ , got it memorized?”

“I literally can’t take you anywhere.” Riku mumbled as he turned away, half hiding his smile.

“You should mention that to Roxas. The two of you can go on for hours about my impropriety.” Axel hooked a leg around one of the bench support poles.

“Oh my god, I’m not with you.”

“Yeah, but you wish you were.” Riku’s face went up in flames and his hand snapped back to his side as though Axel were made of hot metal ( _hot_ hot metal). He shuffled over the open seat to sit by the window, pulling his phone out as a distraction.

As promised, Kairi had texted him.

    _> > I cannot BELIEVE youre in a polyamorous triangle with my dance teacher_

    _< < I DIDN’T KNOW!_

    _> > yeah lol I could tell!_

A few minutes passed before another message came through.

      _> > so roxas looks JUST like sora_

_ << YES! Thank you. Exactly like Sora._

_ >> thats wild!!_

_ >> so like. is that weird for you?_

Riku frowned, tapping at the screen with his thumb as he read the text over and over.

      _< < What do you mean…?_

      _> > being in a some-kinda-relationship with someone who looks like Sora_?  
_ >> cause I mean. Actual Sora is RIGHT here._

     _< < I try not to think about it._

There were another few moments between messages.

      _> > Ah. I see._

It was even longer before he got the last one.

_ >> Riku, are you and Sora actually okay?_

He didn’t answer that one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bit of a downer there at the end, sorry. ;3c
> 
> Come yell at me about it on Twitter! @jk_rts


End file.
